1=2

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A baffled mathematician

One of the great mysteries of the universe is that 2 is the same as 1.

1 Baffled Scientists
2 1=2 graph
3 Proof
4 Another Proof
5 Yet Another Proof
6 Not Convinced?
7 Still Not Convinced?
8 Not Convinced Yet?
9 Effects of 1=2

[edit] Baffled Scientists

The mystery of 1 = 2 has baffled scientists and mathematicians for thousands of years. The evidence is clear that 2 is 1 and 1 is 2; however, some scientists dispute this fact because their moms believed in 2, and they wanted to keep their mothers happy.

Since 1 = 2, we can assume that 2 = 1. This causes all sorts of problems somehow. But

Nobody cares and

Mathematicians are too lazy to figure these problems out.

[edit] 1=2 graph

You can clearly see in the following graph that for most random points plotted, 1 = 2.

[edit] Proof

Everyone knows this:

Now we will square root both sides:

Now we break up the roots:

The square root of a negative 1 is i and the square root of 1 is 1. In other words:

Now we divide the entire thing by 2:

Now let's add to make the math easier.

Now we can multiply the entire thing by i:

So now we expand this beast:

We know that the square root of -1 is i, so i² must be -1:

Now we simplify the i's

Let's calculate this thing:

And so

[edit] Another Proof

This is easily demonstrated

Add to both sides

This can be factored

Take the square root of both sides

Now add to both sides

[edit] Yet Another Proof

This is the expansion of the natural logarithm of 2

Now separate out the even-numbered fractions from the odd-numbered ones

a-b=a+b-2b, so

Now simply combine the first two terms and distribute the 2 throughout the third term

The two remaining terms are the same, so

Now since e⁰=1, log 1=0 also

Now just take the exponential of both sides

[edit] Not Convinced?

We can state that anything to the power of zero will always equal 1, any given number⁰ = 1, so working backwards, we can logicaly state that = any given number. Now after much thinking and unnecessary government funding, top mathematicians can firmly state that numbers 1 and 2 are in fact "any given numbers". Therefore, we can definitively state that .

[edit] Still Not Convinced?

And for you die-hard zerodoesnotequalone-ists, one can convert from a base 0 number system. Number systems always have a maximum value of the number to the power of in each place. In any given place, we can see a 1 as the first integer available in that place. Since in the first place, , we can fill this with a 1. If we move over one place, we get which is also 0. Since increasing one integer value increased the value by 0 when converted back to a base 10 format, we can see that . This also means that every whole number equals 0. However, since every irrational and decimal number can be expressed in similar terms, it can be concurred that every number must logically = 0. Since every number = 0, and , every number equals 1, and thus .

[edit] Not Convinced Yet?

The principle of MI is very useful. It can be used to prove lots of things!

Theorem: A positive integer n is equal to any positive integer which does not exceed it.

Proof by induction:

Case

. The only positive integer which does not exceed 1 is 1 itself and

Assume true for

. Then

. Add 1 to both sides and get

Corollary: All numbers are equal.
Proof:

Since from above all numbers are equal to the number not exceeding itself it follows that any number larger than a given number must equal the given number.

Thus by reflexivity of the equality relation

Thus for any given number

there exists a number exactly one larger than

that is its equal. Letting

See now you know the secrets of math.....

[edit] Effects of 1=2

[edit] Winston Churchill is a carrot

Winston Churchill has 0 leafy tops. But 1=2, and subtracting 1 gives 0=1. Therefore, Churchill has 1 leafy top.

Churchill has 2 arms. We've shown that 0=1—now if you multiply by 2, 0=2. Churchill has 0 arms.

Take Churchill's waist size in inches. Let it equal x. Now, multiplying the previous equation 0=1 by x gives 0=x. So, Winston Churchill tapers to a point.

Take the wavelength of any photon of light emitted from Churchill. Let it equal y. By a process demonstrated earlier, 0=y. Now take a previously-used equation, 0=1, and multiply iy by 640nm:

But 0=y:

So the wavelength of any photon of light emitted from Churchill is 640nm, a bright shade of orange.

Winston Churchill has no arms, a leafy top, he tapers to a point and is orange. Winston Churchill is a carrot. The implications for vegetable rights are astounding.

[edit] 6*9=42

This is to be proven:

Let's look closer at that 9...

Since 1=2, 8+1=8+2=10:

6*10=60=24+2*18, so

But 2=1

Thus, the ultimate problem to Life, The Universe and Everything is the ultimate answer to Life, The Universe and Everything.

[edit] Therefore, Everything=Everything Else

We know that 1=2, from this we can derive that any two values are equal

Let's start with what we have confirmed so far:

Now, lets add 1 to both sides of the equation.

Notice that both equations contain a common value of two, this means that:

Therefore: 1 = 3, this pattern can then be continued:

This can also be done in reverse:

This law aslo applies to fractions:

Now we divide everything by 8

So now we can see that all numbers are equal to one another. This means that there will never be any need for the 'does not equal' sign.

[edit] Other effects

You have one cow.
5=2+2+1=2+1+1=2+2. Thus, 2+2=5. (For extremely small values of 2.)
When I have $1 in my bank account, I actually have $2.
When something costs $1, it really costs me $2.
"2 for 1" sales are the ultimate in deceptive marketing strategies.
Finger counting is fundamentally flawed.
"One-potato-two" is entirely fruitless.
The phrase "killing two birds with one stone" should be reconsidered.
People only have 1 eye, 2 belly buttons, 1 arm and 1 leg.
Unfortunately, women have 2 mouths, which explain why they talk too much.
I only have 1 ear, which explains why I only hear half of what my wife says. And since she has 2 mouths, I really only hear a quarter of what she's saying.
Wikipedia's [1] page should redirect to [2].
You actually huffed 2 kittens, not 1. (Even though you didn't inhale.)
The Count from Sesame Street represents the pinnacle of immorality.