2003

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[edit] Events

2003, The year the US Pentagon declared its first "War on Emotion". In this year alone around 6,000 people have been interred in Camp X-Ray, Guantanamo Bay, under the Patriot Act for displaying excessive outward emotion in a public place, among them being the famous deity Martha Stewart, serial hanky-moistener Leonard Nimoy, and Bill Clinton.

This year was also noteworthy due to the record-breaking number of days in the month of March - 45 - breaking the record previously held by 1944 of 12 days. 2003 reacted to the news with jubilation, exclaiming "Whosyadaddy" and demanding the rest of the year off.

Other Notable Events:

George Bush's mental age was born
The Moon landing footage was proven fake - the recordings were in fact digitally altered copies of the Mars landing footage.
The Mars landing footage was proven fake - the recordings were in fact digitally altered copies of the Moon landing footage.
September 3rd 2003,Sir Ramix formed the Goats Liberation Front following a Goatist out burst by Rolf Harris.
The War Against Terror was declared illegal by Luxembourg
The Iraq War, the 2003 Invasion of Iraq, and the US Invasion of Iraq 2003 all take place at once.
David Blaine hung himself in London in front of a crowd of ten mildly disinterested people.
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy aired to mixed reception, with Oscar Wilde describing it as "the worst World War II parody since Debbie Does Dallas".
Creation of the position Secretary General of the World.
Artist Nadia Russ pushed NeoPopRealism envelope.
Jimmy Saville was officially recognised as being the least coherent minor celebrity in the whole of Cornwall.
The Philippines declares its independence "unpatriotic."
Belarus formally declared independence from the USSR when the relevant documents were discovered filed under "Oceanography" in a public library eighteen years after being written and signed.
Life discovered in Antarctica.
Johnny wilkinson hit a ball with his foot, angered all 120 Australians, broke his leg and immediately retired.
November 11th is The Day The Music Died.
The Drop Bear attacks in Adelaide
The music world mourned the loss of international pop superstar Wesley Willis, who disappeared over the Bermuda Triangle while flying his personal DC-10 "Joyplane".
Prussian Blue begins its tour of Europe.
Procrastonators meeting postponed.
Life found dead in Antarctica. No will found, legal battle between Death and Taxes ensues.
August 10-November 20 - The War of the Roses continues as Sun Tzu leads his army of the Red Roses to victory over the combined White Rose forces of Bruce Willis and Link at the garrison of Put-In-Bay, Ohio during the Battle of Hoth.
Garth Todd celebrates his birthday with Oscar Wilde.
A little old man was found in a hole in azerbaijan claiming to have evidence the Iraq war did, in fact, take place in New Mexico
Mission Accomplished!