4Kids
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“LET'S BURN THIS FUCKING PLACE TO THE GROUND!!!”
~ Angry anime fans on 4Kids
“KAAAAAAAAAAHN]!!!”
~ Angry anime fans on Alfred R. Kahn
4Kids (derived from "5Kids") (most common as 4Shit) is what may be a Japanese-type cartoon channel, so claim reliable sources.
Contents |
[edit] History
The channel was originally the american channel of Fox Box, owned by Fox. Overseas (and just about fucking anywhere else), there was a channel called Fox Kids (pronounced "Fucks Kids" - no really, just listen to their post-credits logo). In 2005, the channel became 4Kids!, whilst Fox Kids became Jetix. Coincidence? No. Conspiracy? YES! And those events were the only things ever happening in the entire history of 4Kids!!
[edit] 4Kids Demon
The 4Kids Demon is an extremely powerful (and smelly) demon that was once locked away for all eternity in order to prevent television from being turned into crap. However, 4Kids, in their evil plot to take over all television, released the seal on the demon by killing JR. The demon is now helping 4Kids goal by creating Spawn, which are marketed by 4Kids as television shows, to destroy good television and brainwash children into following the orders of all 4Kids. The 4Kids demon has been seen only once, in the first episode of Yu-Gi-Oh! Capsule Monster Chess, a spinoff series of one of the demon's spawn. While 4Kids denies the existence of the demon, it is known to be true by just about everything in the universe except John McCain.
[edit] Spawn
The following are demon spawn created by the 4Kids Demon and marketed by the company as television shows. Even Marilyn Manson agrees the "shows" are too terrible for children.
- Cramp Twins - Believed to be the most boring/Canadian animated series in the history of the universe. Speaks of a family, a mom and dad with two kids, a swamp-obsessed nerd (whom many people like the most, due to his... um...) called Lucien (that IS a word, my Firefox says so) and a FUCKING CRAZY BLUE-FACED FREAK called Wayne. Nothing really happens besides regular unfunny/Canadian events.
- Viva Pinata - Strictly displaying the gameplay videos of Viva Pinata, for no apparent reason whatsoever. The CEO of 4Kids claims that whomever came up with this idea must of been a total retard, but regardless of this, it is our best-rated show.
- Sonic X - The story of Sonic landing on to the real world from the game world. Due to this, the Sonic franchise income has fallen by 80%. The series fails to even look good. It just sucks. On the contrary, though, it is Japanese.
- Kirby: Right back at Ya! - another one of those franchise animations, the Kirby show speaks of Kirby and his/her adventures. What else? The new characters are Lololol and Lalalal. They have become supreme and legendary internet memes
- One Piece - A story of a pirate and his friends who not only fight the forces of evil, but also fight the forces of really shitty voice acting, stupid edits, hammer guns and poison suction cups, missing story arcs, and really gay rap music.
- Yu-Gi-Oh! - A television show about grown-ups playing children's card games, homosexuals with all-powerful magical objects, and Seto Kaiba, whose ego is larger than everything put together into one big... something.
It is also believed the CEO of 4Kids is a spawn of the 4Kids Demon, but they have taken a hostage so we can't get close and ask them.


