AIDS (Space Program)

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African International Destination: Space

Established	2005
Acronym	AIDS
Administrator	Chief Man who dreams of sky
Budget	$(5 x 10ˉ³³³) Trillion
Technology Used	Sticks, Mud, Rocks, Human Flesh
Planets Explored	Earth
Aliens Found	None
Rating(s)	Overly well

“Pfffff that's never going to happen ever since Africa had the great Mud Deficit.”

~ Oscar Wilde

“I didn't know Africa knew what space was!”

~ Carl Sagan

“Africans are them funny peoples with the dark skin and really skinny bellies right? Hehehehhe I said belly”

~ George W. Bush

The African International Destination: Space or AIDS ^[1] as it is more popularly called is the agency in Africa's disorganized government^[2] responsible for... attempting launch into space.

It has very large funding from the African Cannibalistic Science Foundation ^[3] and Evil Tree Spirit Remover Inc. ^[4] with estimated funds of of almost 0.00005 Million cents per decade.

1 History
2 Technological Advancement
- 2.1 Digital controversy (The Apple II Debate)
3 AIDS Space Missions
4 The Great Mud Deficit
5 Notes
6 See also

[edit] History

[edit] Primitive Era

When it was first started Africa asked the various gods and spirits to lift them into Outer Space but despite the natives good intentions the spirits would never come from their godly trees and lift them to the heavens they desired to go to. After the failed attempts at asking the spirits the Africans then began demanding it assertively.

An advanced Blue Print of an AIDS Space Shuttle.

However the spirits didn't respond so the Africans so they took their final course of action and attempted to force the spirits down by burning down the many abundant trees that frolic in Africa However this didn't work either and the Africans gave up altogether.

[edit] Early Scientific Era

Main article: African Spirit vs Science Debates

Hundreds of years after the Spirit contact failure a new controversial theory was made by Abdalla Akwetee Alika that the scientific method would work best to the Space Calamity but almost no one approved of this and it created a massive uproar.

Tribe Chief Baako a key theologist stated:

Believing in sense and logic other then blind faith in something that has proven

to not work is blasphemous and down right evil and will never be tolerated.

Although many did follow the chief some underground scientific experiments were made such as many sling shot experiments launching civilians through the canopies. None of these experiments came close to working but sparked a serous interest in science and not in blind faith into something that clearly doesn't work.

[edit] Modern Era

Currently almost everything is done via scientific logic and with little to do with the spirit aspect. Civilians adapted to the scientific ways and currently employ things such as: sticks, mud, sap, twigs and human flesh to everything created. They have also discovered ways to communicate from far distances an invention they call the Cup Phone which has been proving very effective.

Another key aspect is the boom of TNT usage. Now ships would use millions of tons of TNT as a purpose of lift off for their missions. Although not many (if any) where successful in doing this the engineers still use them.

[edit] Technological Advancement

This is the state of the art, AIDS mission control.

AIDS has come a long way from it's dysfunctional slingshots and catapults and has evolved into dysfunctional space shuttles that explode after barely reaching 50 feet. Although AIDS officials are happy with their poorly constructed wood and unnecessarily placed dynamite officials are looking into new, more efficient methods of construction. These methods include using actual gasoline instead of misplaced explosives and maybe even having some digital help.

[edit] Digital controversy (The Apple II Debate)

One thing AIDS is responsible for is having a large amount of controversy over whether or not computers will further advance the science of space travel. Many argue that many other well known space programs use computers such as NASA but a majority disagree. Many disagree on the grounds that computers such as the Apple II are far too advanced.

Later the Apple II was the main source of criticism. Many well known AIDS Science Team officials such as Dr. Faraji Dakarai made bold statements about the growth of technology.

Among us is a gift, the Apple II.....

is the most advanced form of technology we have ever known and as such it should be used extremely carefully as it can affect the very out come of our guessed launch specs.So it should be forever noted that having that kind of accuracy is evil and unsafe.

Ever since the famous speech digital technology was highly frowned upon in AIDS's advancement.

[edit] AIDS Space Missions

Main article: List of AIDS Space Missions

Did you know...

That AIDS was in the Guinness World Records and broke the record for largest amount of failed attempts to enter space?

AIDS has been known to host thousands of space missions per year however not one has actually been confirmed a success the experts are still trying building many varies catapult launchers and slingshots but AIDS in recent years have reverted to wooden rocket configurations with large amounts of TNT at the Bottom. Although Most of the time the TNT at the bottom of the rocket ships ends up blowing the ship apart It is still employed into all their missions.

Mission Number	Mission Name	Was The Outcome Successful ?
1.	Slingshot to heaven
2.	Catapult to Sky
3.	Catapult to Sky 2
4.	Pray For Heaven Spirit to Send to Space
5.	TNT Under Foot
6.	Throwing Into Space
7.	Jump Two Feet Experiment
8.	Hanging On To Fireworks
9.	Wooden Arc with TNT
10.	Leaf Wings To Space
11.	Reaching Moon with Space Boat
12.	Reaching Moon With Space Boat 2

They also have their own soundtrack.

[edit] The Great Mud Deficit

Main article: The Great Mud Deficit of 1997

A typical African space shuttle using rods of TNT attached to it.

One tragic time in AIDS's history was the Great Mud Deficit of 1997 in which a heat wave hit 85% of the continent and made it very hard to produce mud in the area. With this came a great blow to the industry of mud building which greatly collapsed much of what was used to keep the AIDS shuttles together.