Aardvark

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Aardvark Jesus
Aardvark Jesus

An aardvark (or Aaardvark as a useless redirect) is an animal that starts with the letter A, but adds another A to become first on a list. The most famous case of this is baseball player Hank Aaron, who is widely believed to never had gotten as famous as he did without the change.

The first commercial marketing of the aardvark by AAAAAAAnother Company Trying to Get to the Front of the Amber Pages was at best a moderate success; the company later introduced the Aaaaaaaamazing line of desktop PC monitors before finally selling the "aardvark" name to Britney Spears for inclusion in the Encyclopædia Britannica.

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[edit] How to Identify an Aardvark

Aardvarks have long snouts, pig-like ears, and sometimes walk erect and stab things with their swords. One way to note an aardvark is to look for a medallion consisting of three circles, or for an albino who follows him around everywhere annoying him.

Aardvarks are known to do a wide variety of things ( especially smoke weed.). Some wallow in the dirt looking for Jews. Some become mercenaries and slay hordes of underdressed warriors. Some become the ruler of the city-state of Palanu, and some become Pope.

For unknown reasons, these creatures have a fetish for socks. Research has shown that this is not a food source, but material they use for their bedding. It is also well known that these socks are used as petty cash in the aardvark society, mostly to barter for ants and coloring books.


This hideous creature has since been made into a muppet...Dullard the Aardvark


Aardvark.jpg

[edit] Name Etymology

Nobody really knows where the name of this animal came from. Some scholars postulate that 'aardvark' is Tibetan for "damn that's an ugly pig, yo". Others claim that is related to the Yiddish word aardvark that means "Eater of Jews'. The mystery will continue haunting academics, forever and ever. Amen.


Another speculation of where the name originated, was when a young adult male was once having a bat...and he saw an ugly hideous looking ant eater...heput his tool away and kicked the beast...and thus, the formule

math

[edit] I've finally found an Aardvark on my mystical plane. Can I summon a tank?

[edit] Retarded Table Of The Elements

Aardvark is also a highly retardioactive element on the retarded table, as seen below:

[edit] See also

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