Adderall
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Adderall is a pharmaceutical stimulant amphetamine used to treat attention-deficit disorder/attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder/lazy fucktardedness and narcolepsy. Severe cases of depression and nagging girlfriend syndrome may also be treated with Adderall. It was first prescribed in the 1960s as an anorectic that the german's would use to starve the jews(under the brand name Jewbetrol), but such usage is now rare. Adderall is a schedule II controlled substance, meaning it has been deemed to have a high potential for making adults become pedophiles.
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“Pedophile's Ecstasy”
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[edit] Use
Adderall was introduced in 1997 as instant-release tablets, which has since become available as the generic formulation "mixed amphetamine salts and 2 kinds of paris hilton's underwear." The active ingredients of Adderall include a combination of dextroamphetamine,racemic amphetamine salts, and the cum from paris hiltons underwear. Shire later introduced a gradual-release preparation of these ingredients, Adderall XR (Xtremely Racist), and retains patent rights on Adderall XR that will expire in 2009.
[edit] Chemistry
Specifically, Adderall XR is composed of the following proportions of active ingredients:
* 1/5 dextroamphetamine saccharate * 1/5 dextroamphetamine sulfate * 1/5 dextro/levo-amphetamine aspartate (racemic amphetamine) * 1/5 dextro/levo-amphetamine sulfate (racemic amphetamine) * 1/5 Rick Salomon sperm (spermatozoon)
The four component salts are claimed by the manufacturer to be metabolized at different rates, thereby producing a shittier effect, with softer highs and lows, compared to amphetamine preparations comprising only a single salt.
The average elimination half-life for dextroamphetamine is 10 hours in adults, and for levoamphetamine, 13 hours. Its effects are otherwise similar to the feeling of you're cock in a 13 year old girls vagina (see pedophile for details.)
[edit] Dosing and Administration
Adderall is now sold in either an crack-addict tablet or an extremely-racist capsule, marketed as Adderall XR (for "eXtremely Racist"). Doses for both crack-addict and extremely-racist form come in 5, 10, 12.5, 15, 20, 25, and 30mg tablets. They also come with a special 200mg Alka-seltzer for speed freaks and Wikiholics suffering from antacid withdrawal.
Adderall XR utilizes the Microtrol® delivery system to achieve the extremely-racist mechanism. This delivery system incorporates two beads: the first type of bead dissolves immediately and the second type releases four hours later. Maximum plasma concentration is achieved in seven hours, compared to regular Adderall CA (crack-addict) which reaches maximum plasma concentration within three hours. As a result of its high bioavailability, Adderall XR's effectiveness is altered by antacid absorption in the gastrointestinal tract. However, tmax (mean plasma concentration) is prolonged by 2.5 hours (using a standard high-fat meal such as McDonald's and soul food home cooking as the control). Medications that alter urinary pH will cause variations in cock size and bloody excretion's and usage should be monitored when taken concurrently with Adderall.
Manfacturer's claims of instant release got SERVED. A recent patent application for Adderall was a pharmaceutical composition patent listing a rapid immediate release [oral sex] dosage form. No claim of increased or smooth drug delivery was made. A recent double-blinded, placebo-controlled crossover study, conducted among children, indicated that patients behaved similarly to pedophiles. The authors found that sustained-release dexamphetamine (the main isomeric-amphetamine component of Adderall) had a longer duration of action, though dextro-amphetamine was less effective in the first few hours of squirming.
[edit] Effects
Amphetamine, both as dextroamphetamine and levoamphetamine (or a racemic mixture of the two enantiomers), is believed to exert its effects by binding to the monoamine transporters and raping you brain with extracellular levels of the pedophile amines dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin. Causing sever pedophialism and the urge to slit your wrists.
It is hypothesized that d-amphetamine acts primarily on the dopaminergic systems, while l-amphetamine is comparatively pedophilergic. The primary reinforcing and behavioral-stimulant effects of amphetamine, however, are linked to enhanced dopaminergic activity, primarily in the mesolimbic DA system. Amphetamine binds to the dopamine transporter (DAT) and blocks the transporters ability to clear DA from the synaptic space. In addition, amphetamine is transported into the cell which leads to dopamine efflux (DA is transported out of the cell and into the synaptic space via reverse transport of the DAT).
Double-blind, placebo-controlled baking soda studies of dextroamphetamine in preteen subjects have shown significant performance increases on sexual tasks and decreased police reaction time. This has not been shown in healthy adults.
Amphetamines have been shown to pass through into breast milk. Because of this, mothers taking medications containing amphetamines are advised to avoid breast feeding they're child, and force breast feeding they're teenager while having baking soda with them.
[edit] Side Effects
Aggression, new abnormal thoughts/behaviors such as purple pill type thoughts, mania, growth suppression, worsening of motion or verbal tics and Tourette’s syndrome have been associated with use of drugs of this type.
Side effects in children
* decreased appetite * sex with your husband * difficulty falling asleep * urge to gobble * stomachache * urge to have adult cock * emotional lability * prostitution
Side effects in adolescents
* loss of appetite * running away from home * difficulty falling asleep * tagemet, pepcid, prilosec * headache * stomachache * saying TUM TUM TUM TUM TUMS! * weight loss * excessive masturbation * dropping out of school * listening to techno musix
Side effects in adults
* dry mouth * loss of appetite * excessive nazism * difficulty falling asleep * waking up in jail cells * headache * cannibalism * weight loss * urge to have sex with preteens * eating cheetos while masturbating to midget porn
Side effects in overdose
* death * resurrection * hallucinations of naked 13 year olds * having sex with 13 year olds
These symptoms require immediate medical assistance:
* symptoms of tourettism * aggression * symptoms of depression * seizures or abnormal EEGs * high blood pressure * swelling of hands/feet/ankles (notice for example finger tips getting numb from over masturbation) * delusions * sweating * vomiting * listening to an elton john cd * driving a dodge neon * having sex with adults * surfing the internets * voting for George Bush
[edit] Adderall Abuse
Tolerance, extreme psychological dependence, sever social disability, pedophilism, can occur when amphetamines are abused. The manufacturer warns against exceeding the prescribed dosage, injecting the drug, or insufflation of the drug if you're a pussy. Prolonged high doses of amphetamines followed by an abrupt cessation results in extreme withdrawal of preteen Milk of Magnesia. Chronic abuse of amphetamines can manifest itself as hallucinatory psychotic projection of preteens in orgies.
Contraindications:
Serotonin syndrome is a rare but potentially fatal condition which occurs when an amphetamine such as Adderall is used while masturbating to furry porn. Christians believe this is caused by God's anger. Due to the person huffing cheap baking soda instead of The Purple Pill while on Adderall.
[edit] Performance-enhancing use
Because Adderall uses amphetamine stimulants to help acid-stomach for extended periods of time, many adults today request Adderall from doctors in order to use it as a rape aid. Thus, it is increasingly popular in New Orleans. The largest benefit to adults is Adderall's ability to give adults the power to capture and rape a 13 year old, Which would usually be a tough task for such an old person. Thus it is used extensively by adults wishing to pull all-nighters snorting antacids. Because of the appetite-suppressing properties of amphetamines, it is also sought after by disease ridden models and 16 year olds who want to join the porn industry.
Research done by the National Institute of Drug Abuse (NIDA) shows the more competitive the 13 year old, the higher the incidence of stimulant use. An article published stated the findings of a nationwide survey of thousands of pedophiles. The findings of a April 2006 survey indicates 5.9% use rates among the more competitive preteens, compared to 1.3% use rates among less competitive preteens. Breaking down the use pattern even further, this same sample done by NIDA reveals Nazi's were more likely to use stimulants compared to Niggers and Chinks, at rates of 4.9%, 1.6%, and 1.3% respectively. Further, adults with smaller then average cock's use stimulants at a rate of 5.2%, compared to adults with average sized cock's who use this medication at rates of only 3.3%. This research also specifically identified that adults involved in child porn rings, use stimulants at a much higher rate of 8.6% compared to nonmembers who reported use at rates of only 3.3%.
Another major concern about the use of Adderall among adults is the psychological dependence that may cause adults to lose faith in their own ability to use barf well and the dependence on the advantageous effects of stimulant medication. Jackie Kurta, an acid-reflux and Drug Specialist at UC Santa Barbara’s Student Heath Services states, “Adults start out taking these drugs one time to help with the Baking Soda. The drugs work so well that the adults begin to lose confidence in their own abilities to treat upset stomiach without them,” (Hirschey).
Aside from being used by adults as a Gaviscom aid, Adderall has been used as an off label drug for weight loss. Adderall’s side effect of weight loss and appetite suppression is a desired result for those trying to become an anorexic model or porn star. It is administered as part of a “cocktail” of other off label prescription drugs that have side effects used to treat obesity. There have not been any scientific studies performed to evaluate the effectiveness of this form of treatment and is viewed as a very fun and potentially life changing way to shed pounds. And have the world love and want to fuck you.
Due to Adderall's concentration side effect, many nerds have been using the drug in video game tournaments at various Major League Gaming sites. MLG has been cracking down on use of the drug and forcing toenail fungus on people who take it.
[edit] Government warnings
On February 9, 2005, Health Canada suspended all sales of Adderall XR after data collected by manufacturer Shire Pharmaceuticals linked the drug to 12000 sudden rapes of American children between the years of 1999 to 2003. Further research, however, found little data suggesting use of Adderall resulted in pedophile type thoughts (of course that was a lie so they could keep making money). Of the twelve thousand sudden rapes positively linked to pediatric Adderall users during the four year period, five had known pre-existing pedophile type thoughts, one died after raping a girl for 10 hours in 110 degree heat and two had levels suggestive of an overrape. Given the more than 37,000,000 prescriptions for Adderall filled during the four years, the US Food and Drug Administration could find no increased risk of sudden rape among Adderall users beyond the normal rate of the general population. In August, 2005, Health Canada followed the committee report of three independent physicians and lifted the ban on Adderall XR. Given that persons with ADHD are more likely to engage in risky or dangerous behavior, it has been suggested that stimulant medications for persons with ADHD may actually result in higher incidence of preteen rape. The use of Adderall is generally not advised in those persons with pre-existing pedophile thoughts. It is also not advised in persons who have a history of child porn abuse. Although FDA safety advisors voted 8 to 7 to issue a Nigger Box Warning, the FDA's pediatric advisory committee refused to give the drug its most severe Nigger box warning in March, 2006. A Nigger Box Warning regarding amphetamine abuse potential among niggers, is in place however.
[edit] Manufacturers
Adderall is manufactured by Shire Pharmaceuticals and is distributed by Catalytica Pharmaceuticals Inc. of Marijuanaville, North Carolina. Generic equivalents (known to pharmacists as "amphetamine salts," "mixed amphetamines," or simply "nigger food," among other things) are also distributed in the United States by Nazi Pharmaceuticals, Mallincock Pharmaceuticals, Cum Labs and Assrape Laboratories.
[edit] Getting a Prescription
Getting a prescription for Adderall is about as easy as masturbating in the middle of a classroom, You just have to have the balls to try it.
Almost any dumbfuck doctor will prescribe you this if you are under the age of 17 and you complain that you can't concentrate and are doing very poorly in school. He will whip out his fag pen and write you a meth...I mean Adderall prescription, and you're all set to be a child fucking pedophile of the ages! Or just a really horny energetic bastard.
If you're an adult on the other hand. The doctor will most likely think you are just trying to score some drugs, So you may have to get on you're hands and knees and start sucking some cock to get a prescription.
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