Amazon Rainforest
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The amazon rainforest is a forest near Rio de Janeiro which is made out of rain. It was first sighted in 2005 by Condoleezza Rice, when she was touring South America with George Bush and Uncle Sam. However, its existence was disproved shortly after, when both Bush and Uncle Sam declared that they could not see it because of the trees. Despite its non-existence, it belongs to the Microsoft Company, and is still the home to many monkeys and the blog amazon.com. It is also the lead singer of the band Hellogoodbye, though here it is known as Forrest Kline.
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[edit] Human activities
The main human activity in the rainforest is blogging, which is done by amazon.com's many hunter-gatherers. Other activities include cow-harvesting, which is mainly done by McDonald's, to get the ingredients for the grease they use on their burger making machines. Many Brazillian companies do most of the logging in the rainforest, cutting down huge numbers of table trees. A significant swathe of the Amazon had to be ripped up to enable the construction of the New Panama Canal.
When the authorities in Brasilia were asked about the deforestation during a documentary, they told the reporters to interview Rio's governor, as it was 8 pm and Brasilia isn't open as the country's capital after 6 pm. After crossing what was left of the forest (it is plane raining season there, making it unsafe to travel through the airlines) the reporters met with the governor, who in turn told them to return to Brasilia as he had no permission to speak without authorization from there. By the time they got there again, it was past 6 pm. They caught the brazilian Minister of Deforestation leaving for vacations, and when interviewed he told them to go to America and ask that to Al Gore, who was just named president of the Global Warmist States of the Amazon, capital Washington.
[edit] Plants
The amazon rainforest has many plants, such as the bread tree and the grass plant. One of the most common (but most threatened) plants is the table-tree. This is threatened by many Brazillians cutting the trees down for their valuable mahogany tables (even though these could easily be cut off from the living tree). The now empty land is then sold to fast-food chains and eccentic Japanese CEOs who expect to have the land shipped to them free of charge. This is a clear example of the Brazillian's dumbness and how crazy the Japanese are.
[edit] Animal life
The main animal in the amazon is the Mcdonalds cow. Herds of them majestically sweep through the forest, terrorising all of the lesser animals. Other animals in the rainforest include the script monkey, the ooka-wooka bird and the hippy. However, recently the supremacy of the Mcdonalds cow has been challenged by the War of the Llamas, a vicous animal that resides in the Amazon River
