Old

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This 27 years old miner has spent a hard working day in an old mine and is now covered with old dust.

Here you can see the proper method of disposing of old people and their cars that smell like old people at the same time.

“What is this thing? I have never heard of it. I deny it exists. Besides I'm definitely not old”

~ Oscar Wilde on old

“You are soooo old”

~ Britney Spears on Oscar Wilde

“You are soooo bald”

~ Oscar Wilde on Britney Spears

“Ha ha ha ha, I will never be old”

~ New on old

“I'll soon be vintage!”

~ old on old

“I recommend.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Euthanasia

“What a drag it is gettin' old...”

~ Mick Jagger on something obvious

“Old people are hard to take care of. Why don't they just die? Frankly, that would save me a lot of time and effort, plus they smell bad.”

~ Hospital nurse on old people

Old is a mineral found around the globe and all planets. There are old mines everywhere since old used to be very popular material. It's nowadays replaced by new but some people still prefer old. There is more old than new in the world and most people prefer new, so old is usually cheaper than new. The quality of old is measured by how much it contains age (named after famous olddigger Alfred Age). Pure age is however poisonous.

ATTENTION: now available with mail in rebate from This Old House video collection, the amazing Naught!(c)

1 How to get old
2 What to do with old
3 Famous old
4 Old??

[edit] How to get old

Olden bicycle. Modern bicycles are made of new.

Most old mines in the world are closed due to decreased demand of old. There are still some large mines left in China, Mars and Eastern Europe. Old is still widely available all over world but it's sometimes hard to find. Keep on looking for special small stores like Harrods in London. Since most people prefer new there is usually a better selection of new available. One way to get old is to make it from new.

There has been a recent resurgence of interest in old, thanks in part to shows such as "Antiques Roadshow" and "Jeopardy", both of which feature openly old-full characters.

Now that it has been such a long time TV shows like Soap and Friends were first made, they too have given old a new lease of life among new people.