Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/April 28
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April 28: Amateur Internet Porn Day
- 1776 - Voter Apathy - New buzzword in Politics - Offically Recognized as main reason Declaration of Independance took so long to ratify, as no cash was offered for their vote by presiding President.
- 1780 - Brigadier General Francis Marion invites British officer to Weenie roast - era of détente begins.
- 1862 - Civil War admiral David Farragut takes New Orleans, demands to know: "Where are the white women?"
- 1888 - The first pig successfully takes flight near Otakusaku, Japan. Billions everywhere finally get laid.
- 1899 - Young women of Wellesley College celebrate the discovery of their Vulvas.
- 1920 - The Soviet Union acquires free agent Azerbaijan; US weakly responds by drafting Alaska 39 years later.
- 1930 - Steve Jobs Sr. starts selling Apples to the great unwashed.
- 1932 - Dr. Bill Cosby announces discovery of vaccine for Jell-O Fever.
- 1945 - Benito Mussolini makes the Kessel Run in under twelve parsecs.
- 1952 - The United States occupation of Japan ends. The U.S. files it's first unemployment claim.
- 1976 - Ursula Upskirt bends down to pick up a lost nickel with her legs crossed and her knees fully stretched, founding the fake whoops type of advertising.
- 1984 - Tootie's Puberty Heartbreak: Facts of Life didn't include discussion on EEE cups.
- 1997 - Your Mom was found to be a whore.
- 1997 - At least she's not as big a slut as your mother.
- 2006 - Bono finally finds what he has been looking for: love with The Edge.
- 2006 - China executes its 20 billionth retard.
