Eald Ænglisc is an tunge sprecen bi Eald Ænglisc menn.

Sub-tungues

Se Mersien sub-tunge of Eald Ænglisc wæs se sub-tunge sprecen in Mersie, oþþe Birmen Hæm.

Norðimbrian Inglis wæs sprecen in Noe Castel, ond wæs gelic to Mersien, butan wæs ænlic sprecen bi Noe Castle Unitad suppoorturs ond used 'ð'.

West Seaxon wæs se sub-tunge of Englis sprecen in West Seaxe ond Aest Englia, ond wæs diferent as it had feaw ligeturs.

Se Eld Centisc sub-tunge wæs gelic to West Seaxson, butan Centisc had ligeturs ond wæs cwæt gelic to Norðimbrian as it ealswa used 'ð' ond 'þ'. It wæs sprecen in Cent. Mara...

• ...that the world’s only vending machine vending machine is in Kathmandu?

• ...that ambidextrous scallywags and bamboozle guzzlers regularly indulge in panfish interrogation?

• ...that he who smelt it, dealt it?

• ...that he who denied it, supplied it?

• ...that he who said the rhyme, did the crime?

• ... that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?

• ...that a comatose homosexual is both a fruit and a vegetable?

• Fresh air hits Beijing - thousands collapse (pictured)

• In a shocking development, you're currently on fire.

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• Attractive American women are genetically proven to be clumsy and retarded.

• You Gotta be Shitting me! He fucking Lost!.

• Governments of the world declare "All You Need Is Love"; Global chaos imminent.

• Jesse Jackson endorses McCain; Obama's lead skyrockets.

• 1200 BC - Maceþ God Ænglo-Frilsæn.
• 200 - Cleofeþ Eald Ænglisc fram Ænglo-Frilsæn.
• 1066 - Cleofeþ Middel Ænglisc fram Eald Ænglisc.
• 1485 - Cleofeþ Nu Ænglisc fram Middel Ænglisc.
• 2053 - Cleofeþ Meracan Ænglisc fram Nu Ænglisc.
• 3987 - Cleofeþ Galaxic Basic fram Meracan.

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As I walked into that posh night club up in Canberra, I've noticed a strange sight. No one was dancing. They were all standing around frowning in the DJ's general direction. Why? I demanded Is no one dancing? We don't like the DJ responded one sour faced gentleman, he is a known lobbyist for corrupt politicians, with a child's mentality, who makes fun of the humanist Chinese government. Not only that, the bastard got fabulous dental on our expense, while sending restarted forms signed by his 12 year old accountant! I'm telling you, he not only irreverent, he is irrelevant. We'll never dance to his tunes again.

Yes, hello? Hi. Can I talk with The Woodburninator please? awkward silence What was that again? He went out and burned 30 thousand acres of natural forest? Oh. awkward silence. That's a bit extreme of him isn't it. What was that you say? He mumbled something about reaching a final conclusion before leaving the house with a torch and a 12 gage shot gun? I wonder what could that be listening intently to person on the other side babbling on and on Oh for sure, I'd bet he thinks that he is better than thou sir. Because you, sir, are an idiot. I hope he burns down your house as well. Good day sir.

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