Barry

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

“Safe son you goin down the Paget tonight? You got any pills?”

~ Oscar Wilde on Barry

Famous anti-semite Mel Gibson arrives to see Dow Corning

Barry (Barri) is a large precipice off the south coast of Wales in the United Kingdom. It is a world renowned pilgrimage site for many thousands of poeple who come from around the globe to pay homage to Dow Corning, the most revered chemical plant of the ancient world famous for having the most meltdowns in one afternoon (8). In fact if you meet someone from Barry today, they get very big-headed about it, and will try and claim personal responsibility. When they are not claiming responsibility, they are usually claiming benefits at Barry Job Centre (also famous for having the worlds hairiest security guard).

1 Origins
2 Barry Island
3 Sport
4 Famous Inhabitants

[edit] Origins

Barry (known locally as 'Basra') was founded by the Aztecs in the 14th century. It was believed to haven named in honour Emperor Motecuzōma Xocoyotzin (pronounced Bah-ree) who invented the 'Cash n Carry' and the log flume.

[edit] Barry Island

Barry Island (Ynys-y-Barri) is not an island. Local residents have been trying to detach it for the last 600 years. An annual competition is held to see if anyone can do it, with first prize being a pack of Ten Lambert, a bottle of White Lightning and a Vauxhall Nova.

[edit] Sport

Barry is home to the Porthceri Park Country Club Golf course, home to the 2010 Ryder Cup. With its wide range of broken glass, turds, used condoms and dead seagulls it is sure to prove the sternest test for the worlds finest golfers.

Barry is also home to Barry Town FC (managed by John Fashanu) and were Premier League Champions as recently as 1997. Since then, they have been relegated and are currently lying 13th in the Championship. The Dragons play their home games at the Jenner Park, a multi-purpose sporting venue with undersoil heating and a retractable roof. With a capacity of 34,000, it is often used as a venue for rock concerts and public stonings. Most recently it was used for the Princess Diana Memorial Stoning.