Battery
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-:::WARNING:::-
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“Mmmmmm, batteries”
~ Some stoner on drinking battery acid for the high
Contents |
[edit] Rechargeable Batteries
Rechargeable batteries are a problem because unlike non-rechargable batteries, which die after shocking someone and battering them up, they can teleport to their charging station to recharge to injure more people. Although they need supplies from a Refinery(Pettrol) and Power Generator(Electricity), it is a menial thing comparred to a innocent murder of a civilian. They can recharge in as little as 15-30 minutes. NiCD batteries is the most common subspecies of rechargeable batteries. However many other subspecies exist such as NiMH, dilithium ion, and rechargeable alkaline.
[edit] Voltage
Voltage is a measurement of a battery's power. The higher a voltage, the more powerful a battering is. 1.5 volts barely hurts at all. Higher voltage batteries such as 9 volt batteries should be approached with caution. 12 volts is exceptionally painful, causing electrical burns and bruises. Large groups of batteries should be avoided at all costs. The highest known combined voltage is 250 volts which is extremely lethal and able to kill 4 humans simultaneously. Just try conneccting 5 batteries(12 volt)in a series circuit, remove the protective coating from the wire, and touch it with a wet hand. Try it.
[edit] Milli-amps per hour
Milli-amps per hour or MaH is a measurement of how many hours/1000 the pain lasts after the shock and battering. For example 7000 mAh is 7 hours of pain. Many battery subspecies have a high milli-amp rating, including but not limited to the lithium, NiMH, Alkaline and Lithium ion subspecies.
[edit] Strengthening Voltages
Batteries can combine to highten their voltage. With more voltage comes more beats, and more beats means more pain. A domestication of batteries is the the batterie pack. The battery pack allows batteries to combine with ease. Battery packs are similar to batteries, having terminals on their bodies. Also batteries packs can reach high voltages.
[edit] Known Facts
- Batteries used in wristwatches are not, in fact, real batteries. They are a different kind of batteries, spawned in the bowels of hell by Satan to power his most evil of contraptions, the Wristwatch.
- Battery acid is a primary ingredient found inside spam.
- Both sides in the War of 1812 used military-grade batteries in navel combat.
[edit] Defences
The art and sport of defending oneself against batteries is known as earthing.The main weapon of the art of earthing is the earth staff. The earthstaff works like a earthstick which isfound near circuit boards. I.E They conduct the shock to the ground.
Some have also advocated the use of salt as a weapon against offensive batteries (as it is known to corrode the terminals), but the act of harming and discarding of batteries is illegal in most jurisdictions. Punishments include instant decapitation. Odite svi doma.
Categories: Shocking | Electronics | Crime | Batteries
