Bee

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Those ain't wheels, baby.
Those ain't wheels, baby.

Bees are diminutive, yet sentient beings originating from upstate New York. Bee is also known for being the 2nd letter of the alphabet.

-NOTE: This group has been labeled as being a part of the nefarious "Axis of sting". Source: Stingrays Declare War

Bees often show up in Bunnyheads after which, for some unknown esoteric reason, "BEE IN BUNNY HEAD BEE IN BUNNYHEAD BEE IN BUNNYHEAD" must be sung, otherwise Avril Lavigne ceases to exist. (It's unclear why this needs to be prevented.)Can you believe some jackasses die from bees, yes it was a glorious day for scientists when they figured out how NOT to die from a bee "If you hear buzzing RUN THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!!!

Contents

[edit] Social Behavior

The bee uses its size to its advantage.
The bee uses its size to its advantage.

While bees seldom interact with humans, their aggressive nature has allowed them to break into the underground film business. Productions starring bees are known as Bee Movies, or as referred to in their native tongue: Bzz Bzz Buzz buz bzz. Certain Bees are known to wear large amounts of jewellery and utilize a form of communication known as Gangster rap. These bees are known as Bee Gs and can be found selling drugs and knocked off goods in urban areas. It was only circa the 1980s that the history and culture were introduced to western civilization, due to an uproar of repressed bees. An attempt to introduce a full 18 hour class to schools depicting the life bees, known either as Class Buzz, Beesiality or 'Repression of thu yella' brutha'. The proposition failed.

[edit] Capsaicin

Bees are known to contain a potent dose of capsaicin in their body during their life span. This does of capsaicin makes them really fucking spicy. Like hot wings and shit, but even more painful. You'll need some cool ranch and a fucking pitcher of water if you wanna eat these motherfuckers. However, recent studies have shown that only male bees contain Capsaicin. Female bees contain Doritos Cool Ranch powder.

[edit] Relations to Honey

Honey, which is seen in the Bee community as "Fucking delicious" plays a strong role in the life of a Bee. Bee's live off honey, which is produced by the African Honey Bear. Ironically, the African Honey Bear, is their natural predator. Without honey, bee's dry up, and form a stale, hard product, which can be harvested and crushed to produce the confectionery known as Nachos.

[edit] The Sexing of Bees

Over the eons of hominid existence, many prominent scientists, such as Nikola Tesla and Avril Lavigne, have struggled with the eternal conundrum of the sexing of bees. However, the bees themselves have had no problem sexing one another, although for the Flaming Bee or 'Kindle Bee' of Kamchatka reproduction is quite an uncomfortable process.

It has however been discovered that the music of techno band thewomb can help with the sexing of - and around - bees, wasps and general types of goldfish. It isn't, however, thought to work on human beings.

[edit] Spelling Bees

Punk
Punk

The simple answer is B-E-E-S, although many people fail to appreciate just how common dyslexia is amongst bees. Recent studies suggest that more than 100% of bees have trouble spelling simple words like PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS.

[edit] Famous Bee Wars

After losing his Voot Cruiser to a radical suicide bee, Bizarro Zim declared a fusion powered war against "The Bee". It is unclear to most which planet he destroyed in his madness, but most people think it is the reason Pluto is no longer recognized by NASAPlace as a legitimate planet. And you shouldn't fuck with bees, because they'll sting you all at once and kill you.

The Bee community has long been in conflict with Alan Driscoll, lead singer of techno band thewomb, who started a long-running feud when he publicly disowned all bees.

Most recently, a 2007 biopic starring Jerry Seinfeld as former bee-civil-rights activist Barry "Bee" Benson entitled "Bee Movie" was released, grossing a record-breaking million-zillion dollars on its opening night. The film chronicled the true life events of the Central Park Bee Protests of 1996, and the series of ruthless "Benson v. 'the People'" lawsuits that followed, in which Barry won back over 90% of the honey distributed worldwide, inadvertently leaving millions of bees unemployed and indirectly causing the revival of the bee community's socialist movement. The film's release, only weeks before Benson's death, met unanimously positive reviews from the critics. Upon seeing the completed film, Benson recalled that the catchphrase "black and yella get behind a fella" was totally gay and regretted its inclusion in the film.

[edit] Hitory of Bee related phrases

In Victorian times, a prominent political hive was ruled by a queen known as Helen Clark, who denoted many key phrases to modern day society. Here is some of her most well known phrases:

  • "Queen Bee" was doned upon civilisation when she proclaimed herself Queen of all queens, and said all other queens were just transgender male bees.
  • "Bee in your bonnet" Bonnet was an early name for those large poofy victorian dresses, and males had much fun going under said queens skirt. They only ever did it once though as she got extremely annoyed and chopped off the male bee's (pollen) sacks, thus the phrase was coined for angry people.
  • "Bees Knees" when the queen died in a freak accident involving a giant knife attached to string with a spring loosing when the queens office door was open, it cut her body clean away from her legs. When she was found the "wind" had blown her body through the window leaving only her legs standing in the doorway. Now the phrase is used to show if someone has intentions to accidently kill someone.

[edit] Albert Einstein's Relationship With Bees

Albert Einstein once said that if bees disappeared, human civilization would last about 4 years. This is because of bees' central role in pollination. Now the bees are disappearing around the world. It's called Colony Collapse Syndrome. It could be mites, a fungus, cell phone signals, global warming, pollution, or any number of combinations of these things - but basically, the food-gathering drones leave the hive never to come back. The drones don't actually find food, they just lie around the hive smoking cigars and tell the ladies where to go look for it....and they get so pissed off with those couch bees that they say, to hell with it...we're going to the Riviera with a couple of bumble bees we know. This is not funny, and this is true., well. sort of. Hope you know how to hunt.

...Albert Einstein didn't know shit about bees.

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