Bingo wings

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“ Theres nothing I like more than Nana Wobble”

~ Oscar Wilde on Bingo Wings

“ I often use my bingo winged breasts to fly around”

~ Simon Cowell on His Sag

Bingo Wings are small reptillian symbiotes which attatch themselves to the under arm of elderly ladies and fattys. The last known sightings Bingo wings were on the limbs of Kat Slater, Anne Robinson and the side of Colin Powell's cheeks. Bingo Wings are not to be confused with the Australian Airline: Dingo Wings or saucy eldery sex show: Bingo Flings.

[edit] Location

Bingo Wings are rarely seen in the wild but several fat people have claimed Bingo Wings occur due to Glands. Glands are a type of poacher typically found in Northern Africa that steal from African Fat Mines. Though after Live Aid, African Fat Mines were repleneshed as World Hunger was resolved only reslting in furthur deportation of "bye bye fat". The importation of Bingo Wings has been diminished due to import tax implemented by the EU, UN and EA

Bw Bw Bworis Johnson was consumed by BingoWingitus

[edit] Body Localisation

Typically the Bingo Wing clings to the under arm though after mating with H5N1 and Paris Hilton (Who'll cling her mouth on anything) the virus has mutated has has been noted to be able to survive in new regions of the body such as the torso of Simon Cowell and Oprah's ankles.

[edit] Brachioplastry

Typically the surgical procedure takes anywhere between 12 hours, 5 lives and 67 burgers where a team of surgeons would remove the fat from the sag under the arms by ringing a bell loudly. This method was discovered when Spiderman rang a bell a lot causing his bingo wings to just fall off. Which was shit to be honest. This method is rarely used during the current era as the elderly and obese are merely sent to Antarctica for balance so the Earth does not role due to the weight of the population of China and the weight of the Americans to the West. Brachioplastry was declared revolutionary by Jade Goody after her Bingo Wings were surgically removed in 2006 but little attention was paid as the surgery did not remove her face; or giant arse.

[edit] Bingo Wings in History

The Bingo Wing Symbiote has remained promenant on Earth for near to eight-million years yet has not since evolved past a saggy state. In pre-history Bingo Wings were used by Homoerectus as a early means of flying from extreme heights. They all soon died.

The Bingo Wing was a primary tool of Nazi-Germany. Hitler would raise his afflicted arm to show the world : "I am afflicted with ze might of GOD!". The German people would too raise their arm in the hope that the symbiote would spread to their own upper limbs.

During the late 20th to early 21st Century Bingo Wings have made a rapid come back as all things retro came back into fashion. Marlon Brando was seen sporting them on his face, Paris Hilton wore the symbiote as breasts and Queen Elizabeth II was seen wobbling her nana flab of the Royal balcony.

Starbucks has launched: Symbiote Tall Grande Saggachino Mocha whilst Samuel L. "shout every syllable" Jackson recently released "Sag on A (motherfucking) plane"