Birdwatching

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A Red Shouldered Vagna. Although it has a funny name, it is one of the more interesting birds to watch.
A Red Shouldered Vagna. Although it has a funny name, it is one of the more interesting birds to watch.

Birdwatching is a very interesting sport, and is one of the most favorite pastimes of ornithologists, bird enthusiasts, and birdophiles.

Contents

[edit] Origin

Birdwatching was introduced in 1961 in the world's first children's ADD teaching clinic. Of course, the children would rather focus their attention to something other than some weird, old lady rambling about nothing. Luckily, the clinic was near the edge of a city, so virtually all of the children focused their attention to the birds flying outside the window. This pastime was so popular, that during recess, the children set up birdwatching areas where the children would watch birds the entire recess.

[edit] Birdwatching today

The birdwatching phenomenon became so popular that spread all across America, even going overseas to Canada. The Britons don't seem to enjoy the sport much as they "really don't give a shit." Although it seems strange how one would rather watch birds than, say, read a book or watch television. One man claims that he enjoys birdwatching because "It's actually more interesting than you think. Also, I barely have a life."

[edit] Professional birdwatching

Birdwatching is a professional sport in the USA with the most recent airing of the 33th Annual Birdwatching Bonanza, broadcast on ESPN 7. The usual rules of the sport that 30 or so birds are released into the field (usually a half-acre field with "lotsa, lotsa trees"). The players, usually 2 teams of 5 each, then must record the birds' activities on several pieces of paper. The entire field is recorded with several video cameras, to make sure the players aren't making anything up.

The score is determined by math.

The equipment given is:

  1. Clipboard with several pieces of paper
  2. 5x magnification birdwatching binoculars
  3. 4 pieces of bread
  4. Shotgun (just in case anything is disturbing the birdies, including other birdies)

There are also college and Little League Birdwatching divisions. It is truly an exciting sport.

[edit] Criticism

The sport has been criticized by PETA, who generally criticizes anything having to do with animals. Their claim is "The birds used in the sport are very rare species usually harvested in Africa, and releasing them into this environment for even 1 hour can damage them emotionally." A compromise has been reached. All birds must be of a species that has over 100 million members, which makes it even harder to get birds. "Damn PETA," everybody remarks.

[edit] See Also

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