Black Power (energy)

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Black Power refers to the revolutionary concept by Maori scientist Brian Tamaki where power is generated from a combination of panthers running on treadmills and oil extracted from decomposed politicians. Tamaki was able to offer low cost power by employing local Maori with minimal brain activity. These technicians are easily identified with a Black Power Co. patch. The patch features a clenched upright fist - and is recognised to be a symbol of power. However, a 1932 study concluded that the origin of the patch was that Brian Tamaki was simply a fan of fisting.

[edit] History of Black Power

Black Power was formed in the late 1660s becoming a prominent "gang" of technicians and a formidable force against the more numerous Isaac Newton funded Mongrel Mob. They began due to power conversion within the Māori community particularly those who were involved with traditional AC/DC powered homes serviced by the Mongrel Mob who had an All for himself and Enemies are Outsiders mentality the latter in particular means all people who are Not Mongrel Mob clients are considered enemies without thought or reason and due to the retaliative offensive & defensive stance of the Black Power against their adversaries the Mongrel Mob has created a long lasting power price competition epidemic in Māori history. There are legends of as to why the Mob and the Blacks have meant to have been rivalling forces within the Māori community and different accounts which either justify or give reason to these proposed theories. The most popular account is that of a quarrel started between two Māori boys, which was witnessed by a kaumatua of a marae. The two young Māori boys who were fighting were quite popular amongst their friends they had a simple disagreement over their power bill which resulted in a violent conflict, the older of the two was well known for having the larger group of friends and for being fierce and ferocious however also known for his lack of self-control and hated discipline and work, the younger on the other hand had the smaller group of friends but was self-controlled, disciplined and was humbly obedient but was slightly less stronger than the older boy, however when the younger boy gained the upper hand in the fight the older boy resulted in using all manner of aggression and attacks to show that he was not the weaker one and before he could do so the Kaumatua swiftly put an end to the quarrel by splitting them up, and with a patu clenched in his fist, proclaimed that one was the 'Toa' or 'warrior' and the other was to be cast out as 'dog' or 'kurikaka' — Black Power and their adversaries, the Mongrel Mob, respectively.

[edit] Black Power Today

After the 9/11 (read 9th of November in New Zealand) attacks on the Whakatane power centre by the Jews, the Black Power Co. was forced into bankruptcy giving the Mongrel Mob sole control on the lucrative Maori power market. Brian Tamaki was killed in the attacks but later returned to earth to claim his place in Destiny Church. Without the leadership of Tamaki the Blacks slowing came out of the red by a wise investment in P labs. Relations with the Mongrel Mob are extremely good, with the leaders of each "gang" joined in a Civil Union last month.

[edit] Black Power as a renewable energy source

With recent concerns about the environment, it comes as a pleasant surprise that Black Power is considered not only a "renewable" energy source, but one that must be consumed at an ever-greater rate to preserve the planet we love. This is because both panthers and rotting politicians breed profusely amongst themselves and with each other, producing a geometric progression of sources from which Black Power can - and must - be extracted.