Bloc Québécois

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Le Parti Nationale du Québec
Political Ideology: Dont Stop Believing - journey and Téléfrançais (a must see)
Leader: Zach
Président Robert Goulet
Founder: Min Park
Political Béliefs: they think Mr. Zciver gay
Founded: Car crash
Number of Seats in House: 8 seater plus a dodge stratus
Number of Seats in Sénate: what car is a senate?
Allied Organizations: Fish Hunters/ muff divers, IRA,

PLO, korea, Al Quada, Cuba

Allied Groups: FLQ, People with Berets,

Séparatists, People who drink wine

The Bloc Quéerbécois (French for Quebec's bloke), more frequently referred to as the the penis group that no one cares about, is an unstoppable team of French superheroes or supervillains who cannot be stopped. Live with it. Also, they may be related to the French or the common ferret.

Contents

[edit] Political Beliefs

The Bloc are an extreme separatist party and have the following political beliefs:

  • Separatism, Separatism, Separatism!!! very cool people:)
  • While separating, still collect billions of dollars worth of transfer payments from the Canadian government.
  • Create an unstoppable hockey team using the cloned DNAs of Maurice Richard, Patrick Roy, Jean Beliveau and Scotty Bowman.
  • Shove French down each and every Canadian's throat.
  • Force elections every five months when they are upset.
  • Legalization of Poutine, currently it is semi-legal in Québec, but not for the rest of Canada. Also currently in Québec, anywhere that sells poutine, must sell Molson Export.
  • The right for to baguettes to marry.
All Bloc members are required to have a license plate that says "Poutine" for the sake of their all powerful leader "Frenchy" Duceppee.
All Bloc members are required to have a license plate that says "Poutine" for the sake of their all powerful leader "Frenchy" Duceppee.


[edit] Ideology

The Bloc Québécois is a near-pinko-commie socialist party. However, they are also obnoxiously nationalist. This makes them National Socialists. Where have we all heard that before? In addition, the NSBQ believes in English inferiority, nazism, pain, duck poo, pooism, massive consumption of hotdogs, protecting Québec culture which does not exist, (mentioned above) and French dominance. Some people believe that the French BQ can be stopped by Germans invading, which would result in a prompt surrender by the French. But these people live in hotels and watch the "Cable Guy" on TBS all day long. The Bloc Québécois is paid to destroy the country by the country they are being paid to destroy. Their favorite people are the FLQ, Robert Mugabe, beerman, cigaretteman, and the poutine-delivery guy. Other goals include massively crippling the economy, putting French-Canadians in charge of every government related and/or prostitution institution, and also something along the lines of sort-of "sovereignty" from the rest of Canada (ROC), while still sucking as much money as possible out of the country while relentlessly strangling English Canadians with that twisted dialect of nazi French Actually they are right-wing. LOL CONSERVATIVES SUPPORT SEPERATION!

[edit] History

They all got fat. and ate all the putine. but the the monster named Chris met Criss Angel and they got all the outine back. YAY! The Bloc was founded when too much Poutine went stale and was consumed by a group of delusional FLQ sympathizers, alcoholic veterinarians, alcoholic telemarketers, porta-potty thieves, jewel robbers and out-of-work fat slobs who purposely got themselves fired in order to collect unemployment cheques. The last demographic was displeased with the amount they were getting, and wanted to make a party that would not only increase the amount of cash they got for being unemployed, but also include a monthly package of poutine to every Québec citizen. The veterinarians were alcoholic, because they lived in Québec. Finally, the FLQ sympathizers were out-of-work veterinarian slobs who were alcoholics. They were out-of-work because Canadian law stated you cannot be a veterinarian while also dealing crack and offering your wife as a stripper to the owners of the pets you are treating. But that is the Québec way. Deal with it.

So anyway, they had too much money on their hands from dealing crack-filled poutine and all the tips their stripper-wives got. Then they went and started running. You see, these people (drunk at the strip bars where their wives worked) figured that their provincial seperatists weren't destroying the country fast enough. So they decided they would run in the federal election. Then they won. Now I want to stop writing.

Eventually, the BQ had a province-wide vote on whether or not to separate (keep in mind that the moment Québec would leave Canada, it would be annexed by France, then surrendered to Germany). Anyway, the Bloc cheated by allowing housecats and parrots to vote. They still lost. Québec stayed a part of Canada. Too bad for the rest of Canada.

[edit] Important Members

First Leader: BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ! No, your a gay bastard missing a leg!

Second Leader: Lord Sir Jil Duceppe of Westminster, Algeria

Religious leaders: Tom Cruise, Oscar Wilde III, some gay transvestite prostitute Catholic church pastor

[edit] See also


Canadian Politics
Bloc Québécois | Conservative Party of Canada | Conservative Reform Alliance Party | Green Party of Canada | Liberal Party of Canada | New Democratic Party | Communist Party of Canada | Prime Minister of Canada | Canadian Elections | Canadian Constitutional Law | Canada–United States relations

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