Bogies!
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That's right, it's back again. Dick and Dom's insanely annoying masterpiece! Shout it out in the supermarket, in a library, or in a Buddhist temple! Causes instant laughs, strange looks, or beatings.
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[edit] First Usage
The first known usage of "Bogies!" was during a meeting in the White House discussing the 9/11 terrorist attacks in 1801. During a prayer for those killed, somebody started shouting "Bogies!" at the top of their voice. This distracted George W. Bush, who was saying the prayer, and he said "May their holes go to seven" instead of "May their souls go to heaven". This caused so much embarrassment for the president that he promptly wet himself in front of millions of people. The congregation of people in the White House started to laugh, and the combined noise of everyone in the area caused the roof of the White House to collapse, killing everyone inside, and also pressing the detonation switch for the millions of nuclear bombs around the world, which promply blew up and killed billions of the world's population. The rest of the world emigrated to Mars, and lived happily ever after with the little Chinese girls who originally lived there.
Dominic Howard, star of 'Dick and Dom In Da Bungalow', where 'Bogies!' came into fashion, who had shouted "Bogies!" during the prayer, was later seen running down Pennsylvania Avenue, naked.
His partner on the show, Dick 'Cheese' McCourt, said that he was disappointed with his friend for only getting a 7.0.
[edit] Last Show
Dick and Dom were arrested after flooding an orphanage with real human bogies, on the last show of their series. Every orphan died of various diseases. After an entertaining court case where the origins of the word 'Dick' were discussed, Dick and Dom were released because the boss of BBC stated that he "Didn't know that they were real bogies", and said that he'd "Bought them from the shop down the road, with the pervy shopkeeper". He was then shot. Dick and Dom are now the owners of a nudist camp in Taiwan.
[edit] Places Where Bogies! Has Been Shouted
Since 1801, "Bogies!" has been shouted in numerous places, including retirement homes, churches, museums, Mosques, Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Square (While streaking) and Mecca.
[edit] Controversy
It has been said that "Bogies!" was based on a game called "The Penis Game", where players must slice off their own penis with a chainsaw, while making as little noise as they can. (Obviously players must be male, as females do not have penises, except for some exceptions: see Carol Vorderman) The creators of the Penis Game (Who had actually based their game on "The Vagina Game") sued Dick and Dom for stealing their idea. But the Council of Sense and Order in the World stepped in, said that this was absolute nonsense, and executed the creators of the Penis Game.
Also, the original series of their TV show had Blink-182's Family Reunion as the opening theme, as well as faint, yet hearable Chinese ladies chanting "Satan!" in the backgrounds, though this was denied by Dick himself. "It's "Stilton", not "Satan" you asshole!!!" he told a curious 3 year-old fan.
[edit] Did you Know?
Dom is actually Desmond Tutu's aunty's sister's best friend's uncle's brother's sister's son's best friend's neice's uncle?
Dick is actually a popular rapper who has made a cameo appearance on Vanilla Ice's Hot Sex album as a violinist in an unreleased, uninvented track?
Dom once added £1 to his janitor's pay, doubled it, deducted £1, then halved it? The janitor was thrilled; so thrilled he ordered a porche, took all his family out on a very expensive dinner, and sold his home to buy a mansion, only to discover the hideous irony the next day?
Dom won £3,500,000 on the lottery once, but instead of using it to pay off his countless debts, he used it to pay the old Brazilian men who had captured and held his friend Dick hostage, threatening to castrate him if Dom did not pay them £1,000,000? (Yes, I know you're thinking that he still had £2,500,000 left, but he spent that on booze.)
[edit] Trivia
Bogies! just happens to be the name of a 2004 motion picture by Alexander Tom Phoo Le Rahno; it featured a run-through of a chav named Alexi's chavvy life, from her humble chavvy begginings, to her tragic murder by an overweight emo named Skid on her 17th birthday.
Bogies! was Graham Nottingham's favourite word for sometime during the 2003 presidential elections. The most common saying was, "Who's got your bogies? Go on, SAY IT!" he'd then expect his fellow followers to reply with "You do!", in perfect harmony. If not, he'd throw a tantrum and suffocate the nearest candidate with a Sainsbury's plastic bag. Luckily, this only happened twice.
Bogies! was officially voted "The Best Thing ever in The History of The universe EVER. Period" yesterday, beating sliced bread by 1 vote. (There was only 1 vote entered into the poll anyway.)
BOGIES!
[edit] Alternate Versions
THe most notable of all other versions of Bogies is Matt Damon. It is played in a very similar way, by which a person goes to a busy public place, and screams "Matt Damon", as loud as they can. Listen out for other people near by as they often reply with "shut up".
