Bray
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
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| County | Co. Wicklow |
| Population | 300 |
| Ethnic Groups | Irish, Sidmonton Poshos, Scangers, Chinese, Polish |
“I went to Bray once when I was acting in a film. I'm an actor you see. Matt Damon, have you heard of me?”
~ Matt Damon on Bray
“I thoroughly enjoyed Bray Head when I first visited the sea-side hovel”
~ Oscar Wilde on Bray
The largest town in County Wicklow, there are more people living in Bray than in the rest of Ireland itself. Birthplace of Feminist Dyke Sinead O'Connor and musician Bob Marley, Bray hosts the famous Pregnant Gargoyle of Shankill. In 1880, a band of knights led by warrior king George Lucas raided the village of Shankill and stole the villages famous land mark, the Pregnant Gargoyle. To this day, the county council of Shankill have fought to gain their Pregnant Gargoyle back, but have been unsuccessful due to Shankill's increased poverty rate. World famous TV show Going For Gold was filmed in Bray, and the town is believed to be named after presenter Henry Kelly.
Bray is also the leading town in the high fashions of tracksuit wearing, and is known for being quite an exciting place on a sunny afternoon.
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[edit] Bray's inhabitants
Bray is well known for its many different types of inhabitants ranging from Scangers and Chinese to Polish and Old People. Bray welcomes many different races and cultures to the town, and hopes that some day soon the kind people of Mars will RSVP their invitation.
[edit] Expensive and Elderly Housing
The "Sidmonton" area is known as having the biggest elderly population in Bray with at least 12 and half old people within each square metre of the land. Scientists believe that the "Sidmonton" area is of Holy ground, where the elderly feed from the nutrients of the soil and manage to live forever. This road and area is also home to some of Bray's richest people. Houses range from €4million to €36billion depending on colour. Top hats and money giving can be seen frequently throughout the day. Also to see in off this road is the exclusive Westfield Park, where there are no parks or fields to be seen, and also positioned on the east side of Bray. Very confusing.
[edit] Sight Seeing in Bray
- Fassaroe - Number one hotspot for the latest in fashion and design.
- Old Court - Market place for the towns large "Magicians Weekly Gathering".
- Seafront - Gaming machines, brothels, opium dens and mechanical animals to name but a few.
- Bray-Jing - Home to the wonders of the Chinese and Asian community. AKA - The Albert Wok
- Sidmonton - The "Tir Na N'Óg" of Bray, and home to GIANT houses.
[edit] External Links
- Wicklow - The County in which Bray is situated, originally named Co.Bray.
- Bray Town Council - Jester Council of the town.
- Bray People - The Diary of a Madman, parodies written about the lives of Bray-ians.
- Bray Jazz Festival - The annual 2 day Scatty-doo-boop-boop-shubidelibidoo festival.
