Brock

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“The guy sleepwalks. Either that or he's an extreme asian”

~ Oscar Wilde on Brock's eyes

“He walks around with his eyes closed”

~ Captain Obvious on Brock

Ash walks in on Brock losing his virginity.

Brock is a main character on the hit reality show Pokemon, on simply because the cast needed a straight male in the show, although Brock is bisexual (and he's a member of NAMBLA). Brock is also a sexist. Brock's Japanese name is Takashi, which sounds awfully close to "take a shit." Also a student at Augustana College with biggest dousche bag roomate. People named brock are known to not know how to spell "douche" right.

[edit] Biography

Brock engaged in a Pokeorgy, just before Misty left. This is right after he admitted his bisexuality.

Brock was born to Brock's Momma and Brock's Daddy, two people with unusual names. They decided to name their oldest Betty-Jean Barbara. But they found out Brock was a boy on Brock's fourteenth birthday, causing them to change his name. This also explained several problems with Brock's life, such as his dislike of dresses, and random exclamations, such as:

Brock in one of his scenes

* Idiots! I am a boy!!
* Why the hell can't you figure out that I am a boy?
* It does not mean that I am gay for liking girls, only that I am a guy!
* DO GIRLS HAVE THESE?!? (At this point it is believed Brock pulled down his pants)
* NO THAT IS NOT A MISPLACED FINGER! (It is believed he said this seven seconds after pulling down his pants)

Brock's parents didn't like him much, and Brock's Daddy beat him often with a Geodude tied to a stick. Brock often had to watch his little siblings, all named Brock and Betty-Jean Barbara.

Brock began his acting career when he was 15, at the behest of his Amestrian uncle Vato Falman. At the time, his momma and daddy were out while he watched his siblings, wearing an apron. He was eager to join the hit show Pokemon.

His vision is poor. That is why he gets lost on the journey to pointless places. Yet no one knows why anyone would give a guy with closed eyes a map?! Brock is quoted to have recently remarked to his traveling companions, "I'd like to see." Yes Brock, we're sure you would.

[edit] Pokemon Years

Brock in season five, with no more cool pokemon of his own. They are all either Ash's or May's. How the hell did May catch any of these?!? Especially the one on the far right (it's wearing specs)

In 4 out of 5 episodes, Brock hits on someone, and is rejected hilariously, as part of the show. He is completely unattractive, and can cook. Brock is rather unfortunate, and needs to read up on some lines or jokes or something. Also he needs a haircut worth more than $3. Brock still continues to be an actor, and doesn't miss Misty. Losing Ash was good for him, as he gets to be the new protaginist. He just needs to get a cute pokemon now, such as Satan, Bill Cosby or George W. Bush. When Brock lived with Prof. Ivy, he was planning on molesting her sometime, but she beat him to the chase. Brock didn't like the fact that a woman had so much will power, so it scarred him for life. When somebody mentions her name, Brock shivers and sulks, remembering the rape attack.

[edit] Reaction to Ash's Death

Brock is happy that Ash died. Now he gets the lead. People still don't like him, however. So before Ash's dead body was taken to the city dump, Brock cut away all the skin from his bone and now uses it to cover himself and look into the mirror to reassure himself that somebody loves him.

“Finally, this will impress all the girls I always wanted!!!”

~ Brock on Ash's death

[edit] Brocks crushes

-Officer Jenny -Nurse Joy -Misty -May -Dawn -Ash's Mom -Ash -Brock

[edit] Family & present Ongoings

Brock supposidly went back to looking after his brothers and sissters... or so he'd like you to think!

Sorces indicate that brocks 'siblings' are actually offspring produced by mating with Officer Jenny, Nurse Joy and Misty (come on! who hasn't ridin' that bicycle?)

As of 2008, Brock left his siblings (kids) to dedicate his life to breeding following Dawn and Ash ... especially Dawn

[edit] Closing Comments

“That there chick is hella hot, and I bet she's frickin' smart!”

~ Brock on a male grue

“It's amazing. seriously, more than 10 seasons, countless chances and practice and he's STILL a virgin”

~ God on Brock

[edit] See also

• Misty
• Ash
• Pokemon (Show)

[edit] External links

• Brock's true intentions (You got to be a member to view the image, but it's a great site and the image is really worth it.)

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