Chandigarh

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Chadigarh, commonly misspelled as Chandigarh, is also known as The City Bootyfull. It is a city in North India which is believed to have originated as a result of the the Himalayas dry-humping the wet mountains of Western Europe. Chadigarh is one of the most livable cities of the world¹, primarily because of its proximity to the biggest dumping ground of Asia. The city's existence is stinkingly controversial and is hence classified as a UT (UrOnion Terroritory).

'Talk To The Hand' - Municipal Corporation Chadigarh

The main language of the city is still unknown. People are often found barking "ooooh", "aaah" and "yum yum" while asleep. The primary language of the Dogs (the four-legged ones), is Hinglish (Hind-legged English).

The city derives its name from Chaddi which means "underwear", and garh, which means "fort". According to the people who never existed, Chadigarh was an international trade-center for underwears in 100.26 B.C. The trading took place in the main fort, where the only people allowed were either Indians or white negros. The traders were strictly required to come wearing loose sunflower underwears, so that their underwear sizes could be determined just by looking at their swinging dicks.

Chadigarh is known for its high standard of living and tops the list of Indian States and Union Terroritory with an HDI (Human Drinking Index) of 99%.

[edit] History

In 1947, the region of PinJab was divided between the two sister countries, India and Pakistan (also known as Phukistan). The Indian state of Pinjab required a new capital city to replace the Lawhore, which became part of Phukistan during the P(h)artition. After several woozy plans to make additions to the existing woozier cities were found to be infeasible for various reasons unknown to anyone, the decision to construct a new city was undertaken by the even woozier Government. Chadigarh was designed by an unknown Swiss-born French architect, Le Corboozier, who was widely known for his extremely minute contribution in painting the Lona Misa.The Brit-shit and the the Governer of Pun-job sat to decide the name of the capital. As girls there were very horny and slutty they decided to name it based upon the greek equivalent of slutty and bitchy girls. "Rhandee" is the equivalent word in greek etymology. "garh" in latin means home. So "Rhandee+Garh" meant home to slutty girls and whores. After one year someone changed the name to Rhandigarh. After Sin(pi*67.23))th amendment in constitution the name was finally settled to Chandigarh as some Pun-gobees raised their penises in protest.

[edit] Climate

Chadigarh has a continental climate characterized by scorching hot snowfalls, cold summers, hot winters, and slight variation in temperature (0 °C to 50 °C). In winters, cars sometimes melt during the months of December and January. It hardly ever rains in Chadigarh, except for the 365 days. The average annual rainfall is recorded at 617 m. It also receives occasional winter rains due to evaporation of the slimy saliva of the rickshaw pullers.

[edit] Social life and patterns

Sector 17 is the city's heart and tail centre. It is also renowned for its many shops which carry a huge diversity of underwears, including most Indian and foreign brands.

The Infamous Three-Storeyed Skyscrapers in Sector 17.

Chadigarh also has outlets of worldwide chain restaurants like Kentuckistan Fried Hut, Pizza Chicken, McRuby's, Donald's Tuesday and Pubway. Chadigarh has one multiplex, Fuck Republic, located in Money Mujra area, 110 km from sector 17.

One of the unusual and unpopular features of Chadigarh is the Frock Garden of Chadigarh, built over 30 years by Nek Cunt, a former fraud supervisor.

[edit] Education - Schools

[edit] CBSE Schools

• Bartan Vidyalaya (Sector-27)
• Carmel Convent School (Sector-9)
• Chittara International School (Sector - 25)
• Dirty Pubic School (Sector-40)
• GuruCool (Panchkula)
• Ryandi International School (Sector-49)
• Sacred Fart Senior Secondary School (Sector-26)
• St. Aunt's Cunt School (Sector-32)
• St. Prawn's High School (Sector-26)
• St. Pitter's School (Sector -38)
• Vivek Low School (Sector-38)
• St Jamadari High School (Sector-26)

[edit] ICSE Schools

• St. Stephen's School (Sector-45)
• St. Fakir High School (Sector-26)
• StrawFilled Bun School (Sector-26)
• Little Flower Smelly Cunt School (Panchkula)
• YadavinDaravna Pubic School (Mohali)

[edit] Higher Education - Colleges and Institutions

The colleges in Chadigarh include MCM (Mata Charan Maaro) DAV College for Women, DAV (Donkey's Amiable Vagina) College, Government Cottage for Girls and Men, SD (Salty Dick) College, Government Tyranny Teaching College (Chadigarh, India). Chadigarh also houses many institutes of higher learning such as PU (Pin-Jab University), and PEC (Potato Eating Centre).

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