Church of Nihilism

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A church that is widely unpopular. This fact is derived by the low number of people who actually attend weekly. The consensus among the Nihilist church-goers is that there's no point in getting up on Sunday because "we're all just going to die anyway."

Contents 1 History 2 Notable Members of the Nihilist Clergy 3 Nihilist in the news media 4 Nihilist Evangelization

[edit] History

On September 11th, 2001 Reverend George O'Keefe of Iowa was involved in a sex scandal involving a 13-year-old boy he met on Wikipedia. This turned public opinion strongly against the Church of Nihilism, as if it didn't have it bad already. These and further surfacing offenses within the Church led to the eventual internment of Nihilists during the Nike Revolution in concentration camps by secret rogue groups of anti-nihilists collectively known as the Illuminated. Though the records have been destroyed and many normal people argue its existence, Nihlists consider this their Holocaust.

[edit] Notable Members of the Nihilist Clergy

• Pastor Phillip Oliver Holes
• Deacon Craven Moorehead
• Father Eric Shinn
• Cardinal Hugh Jass
• Reverend George O'Keefe
• Father Moe Lestor
• Deacon Jack Mehoff
• Deacon Harry P. Ness
• High Bishop Haywood Jablomi
• Cardinal E. Jack Ulate
• Father "Papa" Boner
• Father Mike Oxtinx
• Organist Angie O'Plasty
• Pianist Afelia Nuts
• Choir Director Fonda Cox
• Church Associate Ray Pist
• Bishop Tess Steckle
• Bishop Giv M. Head
• Father Wayne Brady
• Father Jack Kanoff
• Father Pat McGroin
• Father Dick Nabritt
• Deacon Mike Hunt
• Carl Hungus
• Deacon Hugh G. Rection
• Deacon Shmeacon
• Archdeacon Ben Dover
• Sister Neda Dick
• Archdeacon Penis L. Cocksucker
• Pope Herb eaverstinks
• Father Phillip Enus
• Father Mike Litoris
• Aлл ув тоз дaм Руccинз (English: Phil McAvity)
• Poop Benedict v16.0
• Father Harry Dixon-Balls

[edit] Nihilist in the news media

One member of the Nihilist church, Nihilist Bob achieved 11th place in the Annual uncyclopedia music festival. He sang one of the Nihilistic church hymns called nothing. The lyrics to nothing can be seen below.

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[edit] Nihilist Evangelization

Nihilists have been known to make pamphlets to convert people to their church.However,they don't go door to door,because"It's too much effort."If you want to be converted,you're going to have to go break in to one of their houses,and steal one.