Conservative Party of Canada
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| | |
| Political Ideology: | Fascism |
| Leader: | Stephen Harper |
| Founder: | Satan |
| Political Beliefs: | Biblical Literalism, Eugenics,
Capitalism |
| Founded: | December 7th, 2003 |
| Number of Seats in Haus: | 125 |
| Number of Seats in Senate: | 23 |
| Allied Organizations: | KKK, Republican Party, BNP, Nazi Party |
| Allied Groups: | Bible Thumpers, Oil Executives,
Lobbyists, Hillbillies, Jews |
“Will the Prime Minister finally get something done and do something the former government would not, and cancel the subsidies to big oil and big ass?”
~ Jack Layton on Conservatives loving big asses
The Regressive Conservative Party of Canada is the current authoritarian regime that rules Canada. They are led with an iron fist by Totalitarian Christian fundamental Dictator Stephen Harper. Anyone who disagrees with Harper or the Conservatives' interpretation of the Bible risks imprisonment or execution. The Conservatives came to power democratically in 2006 when they were elected by a dissatisfied Canadian public who were angry with the corrupt Fiberal Party. Once in power, Harper dismantled the Canadian democratic system and installed his own personal dictatorship. He now rules Canada with an iron fist and even party members are afraid to criticize him. The Conservative Party of Canada is closely allied with the Republican Party of the United States. Harper shares Bush's goal of world domination.
[edit] Political Beliefs
The Conservatives are an extreme right wing fascist/capitalist party and have the following political beliefs:
- A hard-line approach on crime, which involves torturing and executing criminals even for minor offences such as littering
- Criminalization of all drugs, including insulin
- Mandatory sterilization of defective individuals
- Banning interracial marriage
- Making Christianity the official state religion
- Raising Taxes for the poor while giving corporations huge tax cuts
- Branding all opponents Terrorists
- Turning the armed forces on political opponents
- A mandatory nationalized day care system in which all children are indoctrinated with Nazi propaganda
- Making women subservient to men
- Making gays, non-Christians, non-whites, and women into social pariahs
- Making opposing the government a hate-crime
- Making women wear veils at all times, and voting will return to men-only
- Drinking age will be raised to 19/20 within a year, and within 5 years there will be a drinking age of 21, then prohibition
- Re-instating the death penalty for speaking out against the regime
- Privatizing healthcare and education to ensure that only the rich have access to lifesaving medicine and opportunities for economic advancement.
- Making sure Canadian foreign policy matches the foreign policy of George W. Bush
- Making the teaching of evolution illegal
[edit] Party Leaders
Below is a list of the leaders of the Conservative Party and defunct parties that make up the Baby Eating Conservative Party of Canada, and the Canadian Reformed Alliance Party.
Conservative Party (35BC to 1942):
- Sir John A. McCartney
- John "Roger" Abbott
- King John the Third
- Mackenzie Bowell
- Charles Tupperwear
- Robert $100 Borden
- Arthur Meighen
- Hugh Grant
- Richard Scary Bennett
- Manon Rheaume
- Hanson
Progressive Conservative Party (1942 to 2003):
- Arthur Meighen attacks!
- Drew Carey
- Dief the Chief
- Some guy
- Joe Who?
- Ben Mulroney
- Kim Campbell
- Jean "Robert Bourassa" Charest
- Joe Who attacks!
- Dog MacKay
Refoooooooooooooooooooorm!!!!!11 and Canadian Redneck Western Anti-Same Sex Marriage Reform Senate Alliance (1987-2003):
Conservative Party (today):
[edit] See Also
Categories: Nazis | Canada | Politics


