Cornish National Liberation Army
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The Cornish National Liberation Army is a non-existent terrorist organisation in Cornwall, United Kingdom.
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[edit] History
It originally formed in 1497 when the blacksmith An Gof realised that King Henry VII had imposed unfair taxes on the Cornish to pay for his many celebrity chefs who were needed to feed the army during the war against Scotland
It orchestrated a rebellion, which was brutally crushed.
It reformed in 1549, but was again brutally crushed.
In other words, they lived then died. End of story.
[edit] Re-Emergence ?
It allegedly reformed again in 2007, to protest about the excessive number of celebrity chefs in Cornwall. A message was sent from unknown source demanding that there should be a cull of celebrity chefs in Cornwall, particularly Rick Stein and Jamie Oliver.
The organisation is in fact non-existent, being a hoax produced by Devon tourism interests.
[edit] Tactics
There have been no actual attacks committed, which is unsurprising as the organisation does not exist. Rumours that they might throw emmets off cliffs, train seagulls as dive-bombing squadrons, or blow people up with Semtex filled pasties are therefore unfounded.
[edit] Links with other terrorist groups
It apparently has been trained by the Free Wales Army and various Irish organisations.
If it really existed it might have links with the Breton Revolutionary Army, the Welsh Expansionalist Movement and maybe even the Yorkshire Freedom Fighters.
