Crunk
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This article is crunk, y'all.
YEEEAAAAHHHHH!“I was Crunk once, but that was before i started writing plays and became a pussy”
~ Oscar Wilde on Crunk
“GET CRUNKED! GET CRUNKED! CRUNK CRUNK CRUNK!”
~ Captain Crunk on Crunk
“You heard the captian, why aren't you getting CRUNKED?”
~ Colonel Crunk on Crunk
Crunk is a state of heightened excitement where eveything you say, do, wear, eat and become friends with is Crunked. It is hard to define Crunk since every 3 days the meaning is changed. Last week it meant being as obnoxious and stupid as humanly possibly. Soon the current meaning (which has already been changed) will be outdated and old. Soulja boy tried to replace crunk with crank but epicly failed.
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[edit] History of Crunk
Crunk first appeared in the form of Crunk monkeys. These primitive creatures were known to wear bling leaves and listen to jungle rap which was just a Crunk monkey banging on a tree and yelling. They then passed on the Crunkness to humans and this was seen through the ancient Egyptain kings as they liked to wear huge blingage and they insisted that when they die all their bling is buried with them. Then throughout the ages Crunk spread everywhere, ancient baboloyians pimped out their newly invented wheels with sticks. Soon after the medieval ages came and a new era of Crunkness was on earth. The peasants enjoyed pimping out their horse and carts and the Knights insisted on wearing 40Kg of "bling" where ever they went. Today the Crunked people of the world are ruled over by Captain Crunk. Whatever he does is crunked.
[edit] Captain Crunk
Captian Crunk was born in the slums of Crunkville. His name was Crunk Cornwallis and he showed his extreme Crunkness by winning a Crunk contest at the age of 3. From that day on he was the most Crunked person in Crunksville. Doctors have done a Body Crunk Idex (BCI) on Captain Crunk and his BCI is 114% Crunk. The normal Black person's BCI is 30% Crunk and a white person's is 0.07% Crunk. Captain Crunk travels the world in his Crunkmoblie spreading Crunk and herpes where ever he goes.
[edit] Future of Crunk
Captian Crunk predicts that future Crunked people will fly in ships made entirely of Crunk Juice. When asked what Crunk Juice is he replied:"It doesn't exisit yet but it will, I am making my own prototypes now,GET CRUNKED!"
[edit] What is Crunk
Crunk is a guy with dreadlocks done by his girlfriend (who is a stripper).
Crunk is eating cigarette butts.
Crunk is that guy who watches you eat chicken and asks you if you will finish the bones.
Crunk is making a mixed drink with the main mixer as codeine cough syrup. see sizurp
Crunk is eating the outside of a coconut.
Crunk is a gangster with grillz made of barbed wire.
Crunk is the guy whos gold teeth are rusting, and gold doesn't rust!
Crunk is Gollum before he stopped taking his medication.
Crunk is eating chillies with your eyes.
Crunk is picking your teeth with a used syringe.
Crunk is sucking on urinal cakes
Crunk is taking you welfare check and putting 22's on a teal 88 dodge shadow.
[edit] What is not Crunk
Iced Tea
Gummy Bears
Opera
- Also see Crunkish
