Dada

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Adorno wants you to ponder this article thoroughly, and, of course, critically.

The dadaists were a small band of Pirates during the dark ages. Today, they are all but extinct. The last Dadaist is a middle aged German man who lives in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. After work at the local Wegman's supermarket, he sits in his basement and drinks beer. Nobody likes him.

[edit] Dada in France

French Dada began during the Industrial Revolution, when the ruling Pre-raphaelites were executed on the Spinning Jenny. After that incomprehensible British humour, the dadaists cried. French dadaists are known for inventing Russia, where the main French Dadaists opened the Salon des refusees to keep their rubbish in, as the goat hadn't been invented yet. (to eat their empty tin cans and things).
French Dadaism reached its height in the so-called Dreyfuss Affair, (or JAWS, as it is known in the US) a homoerotic movie starring Harry Potter and Peter Sellers, and a young Matthew Lesko as an Austrian.

[edit] Dada in Germany

German Dada is dominated by a single figure: Fred Mertz. The son of Evil Otto von Bismarck, Mertz started life as a baby. As a young man, he liked to hide smelly old fish in the air vents of art galleries. He was a true artistic visionary. He later founded NASCAR.
Mertz won his prize possession, the Merzbau Falcon, in a card game from Billy Dee Williams. He cruises the galaxy with his loyal sidekick, Dynomutt, delivering spice to all good little boys and girls, even the ones with LARP. Hitler was jealous of Mertz, and was often heard to mutter "I want that ship." Hitler chased Mertz throughout Western Europe, and even dropped a bomb on his house, killing his poor grandma Ann. Sadly, Mertz never made it back to his home in Berlin, where he began a related project, Kraftwerk.

[edit] British Dada

The Druids created their own style of dada long ago, before the dawn of history, in Liverpool. Gilbert and Sullivan revolutionised British dada with their unique take on tea-making, by placing the paper doily upside down. This is considered funny in Britain. (See "Johnny Foreigner's Guide to British Humour"). This unorthodox dadaist coup caused outrage among the ruling classes, including Austin Powers and The Queen. Questions were asked in Parliament until Andy Warhol brought them all Brown Windsor, which is a kind of soup.

[edit] Soviet Dada

In Soviet Russia, Dada means "Yes Yes!" While spending some time in exile in London, the great Russian writer Kefka met Rowan Atkinson, who introduced him to the Salisbury underground in Worcestershire. After dinner with such dadaist luminaries as Dr. Doom and Noam Duchomsky, Kefka brought dada back to Moscow, where what is considered to be the most significant period of dadaist art blossomed. One piece from the Russian dada period, titled "Ty-d-bowl Man's Lament," sold for over 300 rupees at a Sotheby's auction in 1985. It represents the sense of loss we all feel when our Sea Monkeys accidentally fall in the toilet.

[edit] Poems by Sourav "dada" Ganguly

• Tendulkar and Ganguly
  

He rarely looked convincing
in early part of his innings
as he was dropped on 28
by skipper Habibul Bashar
at first slip off fast bowler Mashrafe Mortaza.

He got another 'life'
on 47, this time
Rajin Saleh failing
to hold on to a catch
at silly-point off left-arm spinner Mohammad Rafique.

Bangladesh paid
heavily for these lapses
as Tendulkar and Ganguly
put their team in
a strong position with aggressive knocks on a flat wicket.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

• Ganguly Fails to Make a Comeback
  

Sept Sourav, a national team
along Khan batsman Laxman
ICC. Trophy.
in in, former skipper:

Pikenensis Synanthropus-Jonas Grumby.
figured the probables, find the squab
considered the did, failed make comeback,
the cricket with selectors considered the did

Snot-billed the spearhead, with, Patel.
figured the probables, find the squab
Kumble also he, from picked stint 3:
him with Kumble VS Champions

to the played Indian of October-November,
The Indian Indian, who pace as 30 place as
not which does include mini Cup for Sreesanth

Munraf was left along after
failed as pace of a injury
during county with Ganguly.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++

• Urinal Cake (for Kefka)
  

Monkey See
Monkey Do
Monkey Make
Monkey Doo
Monkey See
Sea Monkeys
Monkey Make
Sea Monkeys

[edit] Special photo section for the Sourav Ganguly fan club, which I didn't find the least bit funny, and will probably get deleted the next time I look at it

[edit] Some Famous Dadaists

Tristan Tzara, the dada of dada, in Oscar Wilde's "The Importance of Being Ernest"

• Fred Mertz
• Neil Cicierega
• Khan
• Al Gorbachev
• John Madden

[edit] See Also

• example of dada