Deidara
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“He calls his art, a bang! I call them, a mess”
~ Oscar Wilde on Deidara
“Why did all the dinosaurs die?”
~ Deidara on Dinosaurs
“Because you touch yourself at night”
~ Sasori on Deidara's question
“OMG! I WUV DEIDARA KUN. SCREW YALL HATERS THAT SAY HE'S A GURL. HE'S SOOO HOTT! MARRY ME”
~ Deidara fangirl on Deidara
“The only person who is more girlish than I'am”
~ Itachi Uchiha on Deidara
“GRAH! MAI PLAYDOZ ARE BE STEELD!”
~ 40-year old obese Man on Deidara's Playdo Heist of 1982
Deidara is some art obessed freak and self-proclaimed "Playdoh King" that is currently employeed by Akatsuki; an organization that is the Naruto equivilant to Xiavier's Home For Mutants. He is by far the most girlish looking fool in the Naruto Universe (even more than Itachi). Of course, those that insult him usually fall prey to either his various playdoh made explosive products or his massive army of fangirls. Oh he has two extra mouths on his hands. No reason has been given as to why, but seriously...does ANYBODY want to know?
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[edit] Early Life
Deidara was born in the Village Hidden In The Stone (the Germany of the Naruto Universe). Right from birth, Deidara founded his love for art when he sculpted a cup out of playdoh. Deidara was "special" as his parents called him. He was born with two mouths on his hands. Because of these freakish atrosities, Deidara was the subject to a number of bullies. They called him a number of things raging from "the one whom pleasures himself" to "mouths on hands boy". Deidara's ego erruptted from these violent bullyings and he transformed from a child obsessed with playdoh and ponytails to a girlish, egotisical, art obsessed moron with an obsession with playdoh and ponytails.
Of course, Deidara was quite popular with the ladies. I guess one could say it was mostly because of that one trick he could do with those extra mouths....yuck. Atleast that's what he thought. He much rather liked that other trick he could do with those extra mouths... but that brought too much attention to him from the pedophile and gay part of Iwa's commutity. And Deidara's momma said he wasn't alowed to play with them anymore. ... Especially This Guy
Deidara also suffered from outbursts of depression and inferiority complex. Following breakups, he would go through his little emo "periods", but rather than cutting himself, he just consumed playdoh until he became so massive that he'd explode. Of course, Deidara usually recovered from these symptoms within a month.
Following his graduation from high school, Deidara enrolled and was accepted to an art school. He would dorm in his time there, but he went through so many roommates than the number of times that he stated "art is a bang". His roommates complained of over-exaggeratted fits of anger and depression and for leaving massive spills of playdoh all over the bathroom. In terms of grades, Deidara possessed the intellegence of a typical blonde; none whatsoever. Needless to say, he failed most of his classes, but of course was at the head of his class in art, drama, and women studies. He also continued to fight for his acceptance in a world that didn't tolerate mutants. Of course, he endured much prejudice from his classmates.
Deidara dropped out of college shortly after. He felt that as an artist, he wasn't obligated to pass his other classes. Deidara then enrolled in Xiaver's Home For Mutants after being approached by Charles Xiaver for his unquie ability to make stuff out of playdoh. He had a short run as the X-Men member, Oral. His run didn't last long as his fellow mutants accused him of bringing too much drama into the group and for freaking them out with his extra mouths.
He would go on to buy himself a cabin in the middle of nowhere where he made a living as a starving artist, away from the outside world. He felt that nobody could understand his pain. Then one day, he recieved a visit from Itachi Uchiha, Kisame Hoshigaki, and future teammate Sasori of Akatsuki, a crimminal organization which doubled as a home for mutants, mentally issued indivduals, and just plain strange people. The three proposed for the freakish girly man to join their organization as they had use for his abilties. Deidara of course refused their offer and proceeded to give them a near 3 hour speech about his "art". Of course, in the end, Itachi forced Deidara to join after using his ManLover sharingan to fill Deidara's head with head-on commercials. Deidara would go on to have a strong hate for Itachi, not because he basically didn't lift a finger, but because he felt threatened by Itachi's girlish looks and the fear he would have more fangirls.
[edit] In Akatsuki
Deidara spent the next two years with Akatsuki. Realizing that the man craved attention and was an egotisical artist, Akatsuki leader Pein (or Pain, which ever floats your boat) assigned him with Sasori, Pinocchio’s older brother and an artist himself. Of course, Sasori was an artist with a fetish for necrophilia and making puppets out of dead people. Oh and he enjoyed huffing poison too because it gave him a "pleasurable" feeling. Realizing that there truly was another person out there just as creepy and messed up as he was, the two immediatly became good friends. Of course, the two would usually get into arguments over which form of art sold better. Sasori would become increasingly disturbed by Deidara's freaky talents that he encased himself in a puppet so there would be some much needed distance between the two.
Then one day, the two were sent to the Hidden Sand Village to retrive Gaara. Apperantly the Akatuski was going to be undergoing a massive art project to build some massive weapon and it required 9 different furry animals to be constructed. Gaara possessed the Raccoon spirit inside him.
The two had little trouble getting into the village. Of course, rather than just go after the creepy little emo, Deidara spent about 5 hours just taking a flight over the city and taking pictures (mostly wide angle and close up shots of himself) to post on his myspace and facebook profiles.
Finally, Deidara came in contact with Gaara and the two fought over the skies of the city and treating it's inhabitants to a clay and sand show. However in the process, Deidara lost an arm and he cried like a little baby. Of course, he planted some sticky bombs on Gaara and that did the trick. When Deidara returned, he was scoled by Sasori and the two walked off into the sunset to begin their art project.
Oh, Kankuro; Gaara's older brother with a similar fetish for puppets like Sasori tried to stop them, but Sasori handled him. The two then sealed the raccoon spirit in their statue and thus got one step foward in completing their project.
Shortly after, Naruto and the others stepped in to save Gaara. Deidara took Gaara's corpse with him because he had some "plans" for it. While Chiyo and Sakura went to fight Sasori (Sakura, fight? LOL!!!) Naruto and Kakashi took care of the playdoh huffer until Guy, Rock Lee, Neji, and that girl whom we have no idea what her name is came to assist. After losing another arm and realizing he could no longer perform art, Deidara decided to take the easy way out that most artist take when they go through a block; blowing himself up. After eating some explosive clay, he exploded to a million pieces....or did he?
[edit] Rebirth and fight with Sasuke
Shortly after, Deidara was found to be alive by Akatsuki's resident Hannibal, Zetsu and self proclaimed good boy, Tobi. The three shared some words and after Tobi pissed Deidara off, he proceeded to perform a real gay looking attack on the lovable fool.
Without going into to much detail over Tobi and Deidara's relationship (you can go to Youtube for that stuff, get the hint?) , the two never really got along much. Tobi would say something and Deidara would violate him in various ways. The two would then go on an adventure to recover Deidara's lost arms. After going through multiple guides (Sherlock Holmes, Dick Tracy, Dora The Explorer) they finally found them and reported back to the hideout. Deidara then had creepy knitting man Kakuzu (spanish for "poop oozer") stich his arms back on.
After discovering that Sasuke had turned on Orochimaru, Deidara asked if he and Tobi could "take care" of the little emo. Pein agreed and the two were off.
After a few kind words, Sasuke and Deidara had a fight that consisted mostly of catchphrases, ego bloating, sheading tears, and talking about difficult childhoods. It was pretty entertaining, but Sasuke of course miraculously pulled that extra strength to defeat Deidara (see Laws of Anime Physics for more info). After seeing there was no way to defeat the emo, Deidara once again decided to take the easy way out and blow himself up. He took off his shirt to reveal yet another mouth (okay seriously, which mouth does this guy eat with? Oh...um yeah forget I asked that) feed it some "magical" clay and he began to get all veiny and stuff. Shortly after saying "Art is the shit" for the last time, the playdoh loving warrior blew up in a massive explosion of colorful dough, this time for real. Following his demise, thousands of fangirls feel into deep despair for the loss of their creepy heartthrob.
[edit] Aftermath
Deidara always said that he wanted his artwork to be on display on some famous museum and to be remembered as someone that truly loved art. Sadly, the only place his art seems to have a home in these days are in the garbage cans outside people's homes or in playdoh bins just ready to be destroyed and molded into whatever the kid playing with it wants. His hands were recovered by Tobi and were put on display in the Ripley's Believe It Or Not museum in Konoha.
[edit] Personality and Abilities
Deidara's personality is that of a drama queen/artist. He is quite a massive complainer and suffers from monthly bursts of anger and depression. His artistic ego is twice the size of Clifford the big red dog.
As far as abilities, he was born just like every other mutant; with a disgusting and completely useless ability. His only notible abilites are his superior playdoh molding abilties and his art of expanding his ego. Another ability well worth describing is his ability to attract more fangirls than any other Naruto character. Despite his girlish apperance and his rather disgusting trait, girls find something about him. Scientists and philosophers have yet to discover the reason behind this.
[edit] Deidara and Ino Controversy
It has long been thought in the Naruto universe that Deidara and Ino are sibilings. While both come from different villages, the resemblance is quite uncanny. They both have blonde hair (and have a long piece of hair covering one side of their face), they both complain alot and both hold a massive interest for Sasuke Uchiha.
Both parties have denied such alligations on the grounds that they are sworn enemies and plan to have Sasuke for themselves. Of course, one reasonable explaination to this controversy is the two were seperated at birth.
