Denzel Washington

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Denzel Washington was a really, really bad teacher.

~ Dakota Fanning
Denzel Washington, my dad and my mum on the banks of the Mississippi before I was born.
Denzel Washington, my dad and my mum on the banks of the Mississippi before I was born.
Me and my teacher, Denzel Washington, with the certificate that he gave me.
Me and my teacher, Denzel Washington, with the certificate that he gave me.

Denzel Hayes Washington, Jr. is my teacher at school. He was also my mum's schoolmate and my dad's best friend. His daughter Olivia and her twin brother Malcolm are my best friends.


Contents

[edit] Denzel "ON FIRE!" Washington: Biography

[edit] The Early Years

Mr Washington and my dad, Tom Sawyer grew up in Mount Vernon, New York. They became best friends when they met in Sunday School at the Pentecostal church . Mr Washington's father, the Reverend Denzel Washington, once lent my dad a paintbrush so that he could whitewash the fence. Sometimes to get out of chores my dad and Mr Washington used to go fishing on the Mississippi. Once they even ran away to become pirates. It was when they were pirates on the Mississippi that they first met my mother, Pippi Longstocking, although they met her again the next day at school.

[edit] Mr Washington at school

Mr Washington was my mum's schoolmate at Pennington Grimes Elementary School, but she did not play with him very often because he was a boy. He was in her class for 3 years. My dad went to the same school but he was in a different class. He did play with Denzel Washington and they remained best friends throughout elementary school. The Reverend Denzel Washington decided that my dad, Tom Sawyer was a bad influence on his son, and sent Mr Washington to boarding school. Then he was no longer my mum's schoolmate. At this school he met Spike Lee who became his new best friend.

[edit] Mr Washington becomes a teacher

When Mr Washington left school his friend Spike Lee told him he should be an actor. Spike Lee asked Mr Washington to star in his movie Malcolm X, but Mr Washington only wanted to star in films about pirates. Since Spike Lee didn't want to make a film about pirates the two parted company, with Spike Lee citing irreconcilable differences. Spike Lee cast Scottish actor Ewan McGregor in the lead role, resulting in McGregor's meteoric rise to fame. Mr Washington never talked to his best friend ever again and became a teacher at my school.

[edit] Mr Washington the teacher

Mr Washington is not a very popular teacher at my school. He teaches math and physics which are very unpopular subjects. He uses lots of text books and we have to sit silently in his class. Most of the kids don't like him, but I like him because sometimes he smiles and makes jokes. One day when he was talking about the theory of relativity he said to the whole physics class, "We didn't land on Plymouth Rock. Plymouth Rock landed on us!"

Some of the girls in my class think he is really good looking, but I think they're just being silly. He seems to like me because he has given me good grades. He gave me a certificate that made my parents very proud.

[edit] Mr. Washington the Police Officer

After teaching for several centuries, Mr. Washington went to the Los Angeles Police Academy. He was quietly and quickly expelled for making a classmate smoke a bowl of marijuana with a little hint of PCP at gunpoint. After laughing and throwing a few racial slurs around, he was reinstated and graduated the same day. He received the Academy's highest honor, Badass Cum Laude.


Preceded by:
My Mum
Denzel Washington
1954 - Today
Succeeded by:
College


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