Diary
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
A diary is where I keep all the personal thoughts and feelings I have throughout the day. I keep it under my bed, on my laptop and on Uncyclopedia. I know it is safe there where no one can read it. I decided to keep a diary for reference in the future, to actually see where my depressing life went wrong.
Contents |
[edit] January 4, 2005
Dear Diary,
My Dad says he hates me. He told me that when he was looking at porn on the internet.
What is Porn?
I asked my mommy and she said its what the President looks at.
I think its what you do when your pretty.
My dad said you have to pretty and stupid to be Porn witch is ok because I'm pretty but smart.
[edit] March 3, 2005
Dear Diary,
Today I learned that a diary is also where they produce cheese, yog-sot-hurt and milk.
[edit] April 12, 2005
Dear Diary,
I had really bad luck. First I meet a Ginger. My mom broke his back. Then I saw Hillary Clinton and she almost blinded me. I don't like school. I sit next to a fucking annoying Blonde Bitch who always brags about her fucking ugly hair. In P.E., they make fun of me because I can't climb the rope.
[edit] April 15, 2005
Dear Diary,
Charles is Gay. I saw him with a ranndy a boy from my class. After school I saw them kiss. I told My mom and she said that boys my age shouldn't be gay until thay enter the High School age.
[edit] May 4, 2005
Dear Diary,
Today is my 8th Birthday. My big brother gave me a knuckle sandwich as a present, but it didn't taste very good. I can't wait to show the Tooth Fairy all the teeth that fell out!
[edit] September 13, 2005
I JUST HEARD ABOUT THE Prussian Blue THEY ROCKY !!! I LOVE THOSE NAZI Girls. When my brother saw him he was acting weird. I love the Nazi girls tho they rock!!!
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[edit] Friday May 11 2007
Today was a O.K. Day. When I woke up this morning my alicholic step-dad was abusing me. He can punch really hard like never before. I went to school. Got bullied by Butch He is so mean he took my lunch away called me names and spit all over me. I hate him he is so populer but he is not. I hung out with my wimmpy friends at school.
[edit] Sunday May 13 2007
Today my dad went to the movies with another girl. He always does that. My mom bugged me to take out the trash. My sister keep complaning how fat she is and made fun of me. My sister is such a Whore I called her a stupid B***h and she threw me out the window. I'm in the hospital recovering since we live in a Complex and not a home because my dad doesn't know what a job is.
[edit] Sunday May 13 2007
Today my dad went to the movies with another girl. He always does that. My mom bugged me to take out the trash. My sister keep complaning how fat she is and made fun of me. My sister is such a Whore I called her a stupid B***h and she threw me out the window. I'm in the hospital recovering since we live in a Complex and not a home because my dad doesn't know what a job is.
[edit] Monday December 25 2007
Its critsmas todayh and my parents gave me gifts. I got a monkey in a chain! I have always wanted a monkey, but my mum says monkeys are dangeroouuss beasts that eat people. I liked my monkey, since it could dance and stufff... I am so sad! My father ate my monkey while he laughed for no particular reason.. I think he is going mad becazue he was drinking that discusting brown water again and he gots like mad yeah. I think I should go to sleep now... To bad about the funny monkey. Monkeys are funneyh. Tomorrow I am gonna make a time machine! I saw it on TV! and OH NO my penis fell of. :( How irritating and unfitting for this situation I personally am in right now. Oh no my eyes fell of, and I am still writing. My hair is burning, what is this nonsense, and OMG I think I got SEHS!!!!!!:sdasd...
