Dr. Phil

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

[edit] Overview

Dr. Phil was born sometime in the mid-twentieth century to parents of uncertain names in a remote area of Madagascar. He was found to be an excellent advisor to the King Waatachakalaca, who was the self-proclaimed dictator of Madagascar at the time. He served the King faithfully for many years often giving advice and commenting in areas where he was less than experienced. Still, every piece of advice he was given was taken by the locals with a certain amount of awe. It was, after all, quite odd that he'd be the only one in the area who spoke fluent English with a southern accent.

On 17 May, 1974, he was discovered by two American tourists who were quite intruiged by the young Dr. Phil and in what is today regarded as a complete and utterly bad move, smuggled him out of the country. Upon his arrival in America, he decided to apply for college so as to become accustomed to this strange new land. Using his SAT score of 560, he applied to the prestigious Texas Tech University and, with a lot of hard work, became the valedictorian of his graduating class.

With degree in hand, he decided to do what came most natural to him. He became a 'professional' psychologist with his own television show, aptly named 'The Dr. Phil Show'. Despite numerous scandals and setbacks, Dr. Phil remains the most widely sought-after man for housewives with bratty children.

[edit] Early Career

While Dr. Phil actually never received his psychologist's license, he did graduate from Texas Tech University in Lubbock, Texas as valedictorian with a GPA of 2.1, making him the most intelligent student ever to attend the school. In 1988, he moved into a trailer on the wrong side of the railroad tracks and started his psychology career. In this period, he treated young college students, urging them to release any built up anxiety through sexual actions. Shorty afterward, Dr. Phil became a proud carrier of the AIDS virus. It was then that Dr. Phil decided that he should host a talk show, the aforementioned 'Dr. Phil Show'.

[edit] Talk Show

Dr. Phil became an inspiration everywhere to lazy housewives. Since the only other opposition to Dr. Phil's daytime airing were soap operas, You're Jacked Up, Dr. Phil's hit TV show, became an instant sensation. Dr. Phil urged housewives to convert to Oprahnism and believe in the power of the Woman's Quaran. He teamed up with Oprah recently in his career. She now owns him as a slave. Dr. Phil has not been seen for several years and is presumed to be dead after pissing off Oprah.

This article needs more work. See ICU and below for details. This page will be re-checked on 23 July 2008 (tagged 6 July), and if not improved will face deletion.

Truth is funnier than outright Lies or Plain Nonsense: Coherence is like a horse, and funny is like a cart. For your article to go places, the coherence must come first. Otherwise, you just get a cart with a horse stuck in the back. That cart, while sometimes amusing, isn't really going anywhere. If you need help, try asking someone for suggestions, or read this.