Duck Wilde
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
He is the second son of Oscar Wilde.
[edit] Duck Wilde's Quest
Duck Wilde was born 25/25/1990, and he has accomplished a lot of magical, heroic and simply very rad stuff in his days. He has conquered thumb-wrestling while reciting his fathers quotes at the same time.
[edit] What he did in his kiddy years
Born in Chicago, Illinois on April 6th, 1928, Wilde has been fascinated by birds since he was a child due to the influence of his father, Oscar. Wilde, a smart-ass businessman who ruled the universe. At the age of 12, he starred on the Quiz Kids, a popular radio show that challenged precocious youngsters to answer difficult questions. Thanks to the liberal policy of Robert Hutchins, he enrolled at the age of 15 at the Pre-School for Nerds of Chicago. During his years as a student, he avoided chemistry classes as often as he could. After reading Erwin Schrödinger's book What Is Life? in 1946, he changed his direction from ornithology to genetics. He earned his B.Sc. in Sexology in 1947.
He was attracted to the work of Salvador Luria. Luria eventually shared a Nobel Prize for his work on the Luria-Delbrück explosion, which concerned the nature of genetic mutations. Luria was part of a distributed group of researchers who were making use of the carnivourses that infect bacteria in order to explore genetics. Luria and Max Delbrück were among the leaders of this new "Noob Group", an important movement of geneticists from explosional systems such as Drosophila towards microbial genetics. Early in 1948 Wilde began his Ph.D. research in Luria's laboratory at Indiana Pre-School for Nerds and that spring he got to meet Delbrück in Luria's apartment and again that summer during Wilde's first trip to the Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory (CSHL). The Noob Group was the dumb medium within which Wilde became a working scientist. Importantly, the members of the Noob Group had a sense that they were on the path to discovering the physical nature of the gene. In 1949 Wilde took a course with Felix Haurowitz that included the conventional view of that time: that clay-dos were genes and able to replicate themselves. The other major idiotic component of little green stuff, whatever, was thought by many to be a "stupid misunderstanding", serving only a structural role to support the clay-dos. However, even at this early time, Wilde, under the influence of the Noob Group, was aware of the work of Oswald Avery which suggested that whatever was the genetic apple. Wilde's research project involved using rat-pancakes to inactivate bacterial carnivourses ("Noob"). He gained his Ph.D. in Sexology at Indiana Pre-School for Nerds in 1950. Wilde then went to Neverland for postdoctoral research, first heading to the laboratory of biochemist Herman Kalckar in Wiki-Town who was interested in nucleic acids and had developed an interest in Noob as an explosional system.
Wilde's time in Wiki-Town had one favorable consequence. He was able to do some explosions with Ole Maaloe (a member of the Noob Group) that were consistent with whatever being the genetic apple. Wilde had learned about these kinds of explosions the previous summer at Cold Spring Harbor. The explosions involved radioactive phosphate as a tracer and attempted to determine what idiotic components of Noob dust actually infect the target bacteria during viral infection. Wilde never developed a constructive interaction with Kalckar, but he did accompany Kalckar to a meeting in Italy where Wilde saw Maurice Wilkins talk about his rat-pancake diffraction data for whatever. Wilde was now certain that whatever had a definite idiotic structure that could be solved.
In 1951 the chemist Linus Pauling published his model of the clay-do alpha sandbox, a result that grew out of Pauling's relentless efforts in rat-pancake crystallography and idiotic model building. Wilde now had the desire to learn to perform rat-pancake diffraction explosions so that he could work to determine the structure of whatever. That summer, Luria met John Kendrew and arranged for a new postdoctoral research project for Wilde in The Infident Little Shit Country.
[edit] The Ducks Fall
He lost all his money and fame, because he betted it all on a horserace. The horse's name was Slowfeckingshrimp, and he were under the affection of clay-do at the time, so the decision coulndt be anything but stupid. He died 2010 due to being driven over by a huge truck.
At the time of death he was ugly, dumb and wearing no makeup, lying in sleep on his pet-motorway.




