English Channel
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The English Channel is a moat between France and Great Britain. It is 20 miles wide and predominantly contains water. It was opened in 1985 by Keith Chegwin on a special live edition of Saturday Superstore. In France, it is known as Le Channel Anglaise.
[edit] History
The English Channel was widely believed to be the greatest folly of Margaret Thatcher's government. Proposed by Mrs Thatcher in 1939 as a way to keep away from the Germans, the plans were later expanded to avoid France as well.
Before the creation of the channel, Great Britain was attached to mainland Europe by a conflabulation of earth, land and rocks. This land was known as the Falkland Islands and was dug up by Thatcher personally with her vicious man-hands during the Falkland's War. The land was used to create a mighty statue to free-market principals.
The water to fill the sea was shipped in by tyrannical despot General Pinochet, who had stolen it from some poor people.
Originally, the two rail tunnels travelled beneath the English channel. however, after expansion that commenced in 1999, a further tunnel was built between the two rail links. the third tunnel has proven to a huge success for drivers, compromising a road link to the continent, at far cheaper rates to France from England than the Rail network. The road has been temporarily closed for 12 weeks due to major flooding.
The Road tunnel was first given the go ahead by Sir. George Clement, a tunnel technical expert from Nigeria. The Channel tunnel road link has been his most expensive project to date, costing arounmd $756 million.
Premier Mister of the Unified England Gordon Brown has proposed that it be renamed "the BRITISH!!! Channel. Britain, yeah!!!"
[edit] The Channel Tunnel
Once the channel was created, it was realised that some people wanted to leave the country. This was mainly because of the government, but also because they wanted to go on holiday. A tunnel was built 10,000 miles beneath the surface of the earth which a train goes through. Interestingly, it is one of the few train services you can drive your car onto without running over loads of people. To keep people happy, pictures of hardcore pornography are projected onto the side of the train.
