Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

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EM:HE was a popular TV show airing during the early part of the 21st century. Every week, for an excruciating 60 minutes, the show embarrassed average people down on their luck by exploiting them for higher ratings and lucrative endorsement deals. The presumed premise of the show was to give a deserving family a ridiculously expensive mansion, fashionable furniture, drug money, pimped-out car and a closet full of designer shoes for free. But the real premise of EM:HE was to showcase the acting of the moderately talented cast members.

Close-ups during highly emotional segments were de rigueur, especially when crocodile tears were flowing with reckless abandon. In a recent episode, homeless shelter residents were forced at gunpoint to shop for winter clothing at a local Wal-Mart. Upon exiting the store, the poor folks were publicly humiliated when EM:HE cast and crew played a game of "Frisk the Indigent Shopper."

At the end of each episode, Donald Trump would show up with a meat-ball pizza and fire the family. The producers then took everything back and moved the family out as part of a government-sponsored witness relocation program. All products used on the show were sold for pennies on the dollar on eBay, with the proceeds going to Ty Pennington's Hair Plug Fund.

[edit] The Swan: Home Edition

After the introduction of plastic-surgery related makeover programmes such as The Swan, followed by the inevitable self-help books like Open-Heart Surgery for Dummies, the producers of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition decided to cash in on the obvious trend by creating a series in which a hapless neighbour is invited to perform plastic/cosmetic surgery on a family member. The results are then shown the next day on national television; hilarity inevitably ensues.

[edit] Show Cast

  • Ty "Richie Rich" Pennington - Design Team Leader, Shirtless Carpenter, Sears Flavor-of-the-Month, Resident Jackass with ADD
  • Donald Trump - Pizza Delivery Boy
  • Michael Moloney - Gay Interior Designer in Charge of Gerbils
  • Paige "Polyanna" Hemmis - Token Female Carpenter in Charge of Strange-Looking Teeth
  • as they say on Gilligan's Island, and the rest...
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Extreme Makeover: Home Edition is part of Uncyclopedia's series on Mass Media.
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