Supergirl
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“I smacked her on the ass and broke my hand, then she got my nuts between her buttcheeks and crushed them and then sat on my chest and farted - I have scorch marks, partial deafness, crush injuries, shell shock and my psychiatrist says I will be emotionally scarred with fetishes for life, I'm just lucky I enjoyed it!”
~ Thug on Supergirl
Supergirl was born on the planet Krypton under the assumed name Meera Zor'el. After reaching Earth, Meera Zor'el hired a retired porn actress to take on the pseudonym of Meera Zor'el. Through advanced technology stolen from the Guardians, Meera uses internet chat rooms to turn herself into Supergirl. She also changes her hair color frequently to keep her identify secret.
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[edit] Powers and Abilities
- Main article: Supergirl's New Costume
Supergirl has the ability to project massive amounts of sexual frustration on grown men and girls between the age of 16 and 23. This power was first demonstrated in Action Comics #60 when she single handedly caused riots in comic shops across the United States and Australia.
Her boobs exert a mesmeric effect on people and she can anesthetize people with her butt, her Super Sari causes everyone to not associate her appearances as Supergirl with Meera Syal.
In addition, the ability to generate atomic energy out of her butt through eating criminals, such as Lex Luthor, (and innocent bystanders on a few occasions, when she really, really needed the methane) has enabled her to keep planets where the nearby star has died warm until her hubby can haul a star by from elsewhere. After eating criminals, they and converted into to methane. It is believed she converts all were bodily waste into various gases, resulting in obscene levels of methane production.
[edit] Supergirl Today
In between crimefighting Supergirl spends most of her time living under the alias of Meera Syal with her husband who is really Superman - a comedy duo explains the sudden absences and strange pre-occupation with rushing into revolving doors or Telephone Boxes and sudden disappearances, these are all explained as being tricks done with the assistance of David Copperfield (real name Spiderman).
She earns a living as a dominatrix.
[edit] Facts about Supergirl
- In the landmark Supreme Court case Supergirl v. Nixon, it was established that Super flatulence during a presidential address could be considered as acceptable comment in circumstances in which the President later turned out to be a total hypocrite. The identity of one of of the informants on Watergate was discovered during this incident; Deep Throat was not discovered, but the identity of Deep Nose was later discovered after he died from inhalation of noxious gases.
- There are a variety of UN Resolutions out against her - one instructing her to watch where she is sitting after she accidentally crushed one man to death, another banning her from eating baked beans anywhere on planet Earth after she accidentally vaporised a Pacific Island with a Super Fart (originally thought to be due to an illegal French Atomic Weapons test).
- Some say Heather Brooke is the new supergirl, as she has the power of ultimate absorption.
- I'm doing supergirl right now, and it's true, she reeks! But that's fine and kinky, she's also digesting my wife...she was a bitch.
[edit] Controversy
Supergirl is known for her gassy way of dealing with crime, but what does she do after? In 2006, Supergirl was seen humping her massive belly as if she was giving the back of it butt-sex. Study of her DNA reveals that Supergirl is actually the greatest woman in the universe when it comes to sex, to the point that she can do anything a man can do without the use of any of this "apendages." This also explains at least two hundred reports that lesbians were knocked up by her. The heavily pregnant women mysteriously disappeared week after each one explained the event.
During her "Belly Sex," Supergirl alluded to actually having sex with someone in her belly, the identity of which remains unknown. A audio recording of the event went like this:
"OH! Batgirl! Work it! Oh fucking work it! Oh yeah baby! Fuck me bitch, I want your Green Ass inside me, oh fuck yeah! I'm screwing Batgirl! I'm fucking Commissioner Gordon's daughter! Fuck Yeah Batgirl!"
As of this moment, the identity of her ingested lover remains a mystery.
Although not an actual lesbian, Supergirls lesbian encounters are apparently the only non-superheroic things about her that are reported. One newspaper will tell you of how she managed to destroy an army of advancing Cyborg Zombies, wheras another will tell you how she did every Bunny in the playboy mansion. She-Hulk is one of her fully seen one time lovers, they even gave this "soundbite," not that they knew about it.
"She-Hulk, take your draws off and work your legs, move your ass up like a keg, let me tap it, I must have it! Green Bitch! You are mine, I'll drink your ass like wine, and when rancid poop excretes all over your head, you know you should be dead!"
"Supergirl I know your hot, you shake it so damn good! And when you shit out some hot chick, I'll screw her too."
"You slut, I know and an argument I will not start, and there's one thing we love, it's when I fart! Yeah bitch! That's the way I run and turn!"
"Don't worry Supergirl, your on fire! My puss will burn, for yours! You know Supergirl..."
"Yes my food makes my belly huge, like yours. No, no fetus inside, just a lot of bad guys, melted into a lump. And if your were to straddle it, you give it a mighty hump, right?"
"No Supergirl, that's not what I'd do. I'd grab your massive tits and drink I'd drink em' dry. Lemmie Lie."
"Lemmie tell you the truth."
"I've done your whole family."
"I'd done your too!"
This was later put to music and turned into a smash internet download. Supergirl admits she liked the beat, but felt slightly disturbed by her own words. She-Hulk however was over the moon with it and even admitted to playing the song whenever she had sex. Despite both of them declaring it to have been the best sex of their lives, they have stated that they are unlikely to do it again, Supergirl stating, "I have an annoying tendency to kill my lovers with my farts, I know She-Hulk's different in that way, but after hearing the song, I'm not sure I find my farts sensual any more." She-Hulk said, "I'd love to fuck her again, but since she's so damn good with it, the first time she actually broke my pelvis, and it felt so damn good!"
[edit] Quotes
“Villains! You face supermodelesque gassy justice!”
~ Supergirl on Villians
“My butt is nice and round, feel it!”
~ Supergirl on her butt
“I like "justice"!”
~ Supergirl on eating people
“Hey creep, stop lookin' at my belly, my boobs are up here! Stop looking at my boobs, my eyes are up here!”
~ Supergirl on perverts
“I just dropped a log made up of Pamela Anderson, Brittney Spears, Jimmy Hendrix and Weird Al, all from Opra Winfrey's evil clone.”
~ Supergirl
“I think I've had all the sex I can handle once I've made love to Godzilla.”
~ Supergirl on Fucking Godzilla
“Yummy, yummy, yummy I've got bad guys in my tummy, and I think I'm gonna chuck.”
~ Supergirl on vore
“Yes, I was married to Superman. Why'd we break it off? Lets just say that he's Faster than a Speeding Bullet.”
~ Supergirl on Superman
“Why don't people take me seriously? If I can't fart, or eat people, then how do I protect the world?...Lets ignore my Superstrength and flight for a second, kay?”
~ Supergirl on herself
“The kid looked eighteen, I swear! Uh...my eyesights on the fritz...you get told you just slept with a twelve year old and aren't freaked out!”
~ Supergirl on pedophilia
“This faggot can't think of any good quotes.”
~ Supergirl on this page
[edit] See also
- Flatulence
- Masturbation
- Fetish
- Vore
- Superboi her twin brother
 Paraphilias, and Assorted Perversions | |
Body
Assorted fetii
| |
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