Fenway Park
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Fenway Park is the oldest, smallest, least comfortable, and most expensive park in Major League Baseball. Yet fans and tourists from around the world flock en masse to this cesspit of sweat and urine because it's all historical or something. Due to the stadium's small size there is no such thing as a bad seat because no matter what you're sitting behind one of the stadium's copious columns but can always see the New York Yankees pumping steroids and underage girls in their dugout.
[edit] The Big Citgo Sign
The best thing about the park is that you can see a big Citgo sign. This sign is very famous for obvious reasons. Sam Horn is the only man to successfully hit the Citgo sign with a towering home run, causing thousands of dangerous shards of mercury-coated neon tubing to fall to the street below and releasing deadly clouds of highly toxic neon gas. Sam Horn is much revered for this reason.
“This entry is entirely factual!”
~ Oscar Wilde on Facts
"I'm just glad that somebody finally believes me" ~Sam Horn
[edit] The Green Monster
The second greatest thing about Fenway Park is the famous Green Monster (not to be confused with the Incredible Hulk). Starting out as just a puny insignificant plywood partition in 1903, it was accidentally doused with a vial of growth serum and has since expanded to gargantuan proportions and now threatens to engulf all of Greater Boston and rob many potential home runs from the visiting teams.
As of 2005, the Green Monster is reportedly having a secret love affair with the big Citgo sign.
