Fred Bear
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[edit] Early Years
Born in the small British coastal town of Keighley, Fred had an undistinguished childhood. At age of 12 he was kicked out his house by his parents, and forced to find employment. Working for two years as a chav he was caught and sentenced to 6 months hard labour in Argentina. Upon his release he was briefly married to Yvette Fielding, and they had one donkey.
[edit] Moving to France
Eventually, as global warming became an issue, Fred moved to France where he spent 8 years working as a busker playing light jazz on the Parisian Metro before being caught and again sentenced to hard labour as the French Prime Minister.
[edit] As Prime Minister
After spending six months as PM, Fred was forced to give up his beloved Devil Worship and became a Scientologist. He divorced Yvette Fielding after meeting his next love, Tom Cruise in a Spanish nightclub, although this relationship did not last, and Fred took a trip to Las Vegas where he met his future wife, Charlotte Church, working in a cocktail bar. The pair were married the next morning, and have fourteen pet cats. On March 24th, Fred blew up part of a French University as an attempt to end the week long Paris Pensioner Riots.
[edit] Trivia
- Fred hates Oscar Wilde.
- Fred has never been to Turkmenistan despite owning four houses there.
- Fred wrote Bonfire of the Vanities.
