Fuck

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I Call ‘em Like I See ‘em

“My dear lad, I believe I should engage in the act of a fuck with my penis into your rear anal area my good sir. Please reply promptly.”

~ A kind gentleman

“Cartman, did you just say the F word?”

~ Mrs. Garrison

“Augggggghhh”

~ Fuck the Magic Dragon

“Jew?”

~ Eric Cartman in response to Mrs. Garrison

“ Well Fuckity Fuck Fuck”

~ Italian Mobster

“You know, it's funny...whenever I hear that word I immediately think of your mother.”

~ Oscar Wilde

“ Well Fuck-a-doodle-doo!”

~ shaun of the dead on the arrival of zombiepete

Fuck, not to be confused with FCUK (or FKCU, or even FKUC for that matter), is a phrase commonly used to insult, but it actually means sex. Meaning, when a fucking person say's "fuck you", they mean to murder you through sexual intercourse. Or when they say "fuck off", they mean to have sexual intercourse with you in such a manner that you are thrust off a large area (such as a building, or cliff).

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Fuck.

The word "fuck" is derived from the ancient Hebrew phaahk meaning "to be in need of a woman". Nowadays, it has fucking many uses and has really soared in popularity in fucking non-English speaking nations due to the success of U.S, Australian and British television sexual exploits, particularly the series The Derryn Hinch Experience and "Let's Fuck Your Mother's Fuckhole".

[edit] Chemistry

Details of the chemical synthesis of FUCK. (Technical note: A tremendous burst of energy spouts from the tip of the molecule on the left after the reaction)

FUCK is an orgasmic isotope composed of Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon and Potassium, and is the basic component of the erotic acids fucitol, fucol, and fukugetin. It is purified from a number of raw ores such as fukalite and fornacite. There is some controversy in the extraction of FUCK from sodamite; some say that resulting FUCK is a bent isomer and excessively high in gayons. SEX (sodium ethyl xanthate) is a similar compound used extensively in mining FUCK. FUCK is also widely used in the drug Fukitol and Jammitin}} (reference). A molecule often seen in conjunction with FUCK is Fe₂Mg₅Si₈O₂₂(OH)₂.

[edit] How-To (Or Do It Yourself!)

There are many ways to fuck. Like the time she got an extension cord and tied me up and then stuck my penis in here ass then she slaped my face with a used toothbrush while singing the theme from titanic then she stuck my penis up her nose and was like, 'shit bitch, your fucking lucky that I fucking like you fat ass cunt' like seriously that was fucking hot and then she got some old chopsticks and stuck them up inside my penis and it fucking hurt like a blow torch being stuck up your ass the turned on but she said if i would go through with it i'd totally get a raging BJ and like then i champagne and opened up her ass cheeks and poured it inside and the shook her by smashing her head on my hard cock and then i opened up her ass cheeks and drank it out. it was brown and tasted like tea. You can use any number of positions, such as thrusting into the ass, the mouth, the vagina, the ear(once you go black, you go deaf), or the tits(and if your a catholic priest you can stick it in a little childs belly button). If you are so pathetic that you can't find an animal, woman/man, or child to fuck you can do it yourself. This technique is called masturbation. What you do is grab your penis and wiggle it around until a white, syrupy solution called semen (not to be confused with sea men) cums out.

[edit] "Making Fuck"

Fucking Russian Berserkers commonly sing traditional fucking folk songs about "making fuck". The lyrics are particularly eloquent (compared to regular Berserker music) as is summed up most clearly when the singer plaintively wails "My love for you is ticking clock, Berserker!". As one can see, the Berserker custom is to follow the verse with a cry of "Berserker!", proclaiming to all the world just who it is that is making fuck. The "big pile off shit movie" aka Clerks features the traditional song as a homage to the documentary's creator Kevin "Russian dancing bear" Smith.

[edit] Origins

The word Fuck was coined by Shakespeare in 1582 when he was writing the Comedy of Errors. Upon finishing the play he realized that he had only included sex in the plot and no death (immenent death, but not death itself.)While sex is not apparent in The Comedy of errors, Antipholous alludes to it when he wants to break down his wife Adrianna's "house" with his "staff". Upon realizing that he had only included "Le petit morie" in his play, and not "Big Death". Mr. Shakespeare exclaimed "Oh fuck! This is supposed to be a tragedy, but no one dies." Realizing his genius in discovering a new word, Shakespeare revised the Comedy of Errors to say "fuck" in place of sex. The word "Fuck" is used 1993 times in The Comedy of Errors. This is how "Fuck" came to be used in modern English.

In the TV was here.

Other forms of the word "fuck" have been coined by other literary geniuses, chiefly Oscar Wilde. In his only novel, The Ugly Ass Picture of Samuel L. Jackson, the main character, Samuel L. Jackson yells "I am tired of this motherfuckin picture getting more motherfuckin ugly." This is the first recorded use of "motherfucker."

[edit] Famous person who is obsessed with the word "fuck"

The entrance of Leonard Carlo's tavern in Colorado Springs, a billboard sign saying NO FUCKING PUBLIC RESTROOMS OR PAY PHONES. Not that this guy could stop himself.

One of his signs in his bar containing the word fuck.

There was a famous fuking tavern owner in Colorado Springs named Leonard Carlo who wouldn't say a fucking sentence without saying fuck day or night, 24/7. The name of the fucking tavern is Leonard's II Bar & Karaoke. He also has a fucking dog named "Fuck You." He has more than 50 fucking signs containing the word fuck like, Leonard's II Fucking Much, No Fucking Children, Animals, Tabs Or Checks!, No Fucking Tap Or Draw Beer, restrooms saying Fucking Women and Fucking Men, No Fucking Public Restrooms or Pay Phones and he even tattooed his bald head which reads Fuck U Leave Me the FUCK Alone. John Stossel invaded his bar and interviewed him in 1999 on 20/20 It was also invented as a way to explain the essence of life.

[edit] Acronym usage

FUCK means

• Fornication Under (the) Consent (of the) King
• For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge
• For Using Carnal Knowledge
• Federal University of Covington, Kentucky
• Federal University of Central Kentucky

Example acronym for the word fuck. Is that where you're going?

• Federal University of Central Kansas
• The Finnish University of Chemistry and Kinesiology"
• The Free Union of Cardinals of Koligrand
• Fear(the)Ugly Crappy Kangaroo
• The Friendly Universal Caring Kind (a real fucking band from Fucktoona, Fucksylvania!)
• Friendship Unity Caring and Kindness
• The Fairfield union charging Knights my home school
• Friends University of Central Kansas
• Federational Unitarian Church of Kentucky

[edit] Famous Quotes

• ""I like to fuck" -All americans
• ""Fuck" -Everyone (except a mormon, who would say "frick")
• ""Fuck you 'kay, you fuckin' blowjob!" -Angry Filipino

"WARNING: Engaging in fuck may make your willy fall off" -Big Book of Scientology

• "FUCKTASTIC!!!!!!" - Spongebob
• ""What a fucking piece of motherfucking bullfuck!" -Angry Video Game Nerd
• "Fuckerin fuckertash" -Sylvester
• "You can't just unfuck a kid" -Chuck Palanuick
• "fuck those fucking fuckers!!" -George Carlin
• "fuck you fuckball!!" -Dennis Farina
• ""bleeb bleep mo' fucker
• "Oh not that fuckin potter kid again... fuck this!" - Voldermort
• "Here's two words for you: shut the fuck up - Robert DeNiro
• "Fuck! FUCK! Undo, undo! oh, damn it....-
• "Shut the fuck up, Donny." - Walter Sobchek
• "i wanna fuck you hard, baby!" - your mom, to the milkman
• "And I say unto thee, go out into the world and teach every living creature how to fuck. - Jesus Christ Jewbook 12:34
• "Up the shut fuck, you must." - Yoda
• "You gotta get the fuck outta here" - Me to your mom last night.
• "Why don't you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself?" - Your Mom, to you
• "We're going to fuck them up the ass for every dime they have when Vista is released" - Bill Gates
• "Have you seen our fucking gas bill?" - Adolf Hitler
• "Enough's e-fuckin-nough! I have fuckin' had it with all these mothafuckin' snakes on this mothafuckin' plane!" - Samuel L. Jackson
• "You fucked who?" - Hillary Clinton (several occasions)
• "Where's that fucking wabbit?!" - Elmer Fudd
• "I'd like to fuck his ass!" - Tom Cruise
• "Jesus titty-fucking Christ......." - Mr. Garrison
• "Fuck this and fuck that / Fuck it all and fuck her / fucking brat!"- Johnny Rotten
• "Can't fuck this- M.C. Hammer
• "Fukkkkkk"-Some Drunk Guy
• "I fucking hate Shawne Merriman" - Mewtwo
• "Fuck, Fuckitty, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck" -Eric Cartman
• "Nobody fucks uncles quite like you." - Terrence & Phillip on Uncle Fuckers
• "Fuck! My kidneys!" -Charlie the Unicorn
• "Fuck! I just lost the game!" - Prime minister of England
• "We're gonna be outta the butt, and into the FUCK, if we dont come up with that $30!"- Tourettes Guy
• "Fuckitty Fuck Fuck, Fuckitty Fuck Fuck, Fuckitty Fuck Fuck Fuck." - Some guy parodying Frosty the Snowman
• "Fuck's sake, fuck off, you're cramping my style, stupid fucker!" - Ant to Dec (or Dec to Ant, who fucking cares)
• "Maybe, Maybe Not, Maybe go Fuck yourself"- Marky Mark Walberg in "The Departed
• "Yipee Ki Yay Motherfucker!!" - Bruce Willis
• "I had fuck for breakfast and it tasted like wan-tons" - The Casey
• "FUCKKKK MY LIFEE." -everyone (especialy EMOSSSS)
• "I don't give a flying FUCK MOTHER FUCKER!" - Alexi from Children of Bodom
• "Fucking... what the fucking fuck... who the fuck fucked this fucking... how did you two fucking fucks... FUCK!!!" - David Della Rocco, the mothuh fuckin' Boondock Saints
• "i'm gonna cut your nuts off and shove them down you fucking throat" tom berenger
• "them mutherfuckers" tom berenger
• "I used to fuck guys like you in prison" bad guy who dies in Roadhouse
• "Fuck it all, fuck this world, fuck everything that you stand for." - a snippet from Slipknot's song "Surfacing."
• "Fuck, fuck, fuck ,fuck. mother mother fuck. mother mother fuck fuck. mother fuck mother fuck noice noice noice."-jay
• "Fuck is like, THE best word ever. It really is. Its perfect. It has the Fuh, the UH and the KUH!"-Dane Cook
• "Go fuck a refridgerator!"-Some kid to RoboCop
• "Kane fucked me!"-RoboCop
• "Are you thirsty? How about a piping hot cup of SHUT THE FUCK UP!"-This fag I know
• "I want to fuck a dog in the ass, he wants to fuck a dog in the ass, i just wanna fuck a dog" Tom DeLonge_
• "Fuck." - Everybody
• "Oh Fuck." - Me
• So fucking what.... well, i've fucked the queen, and i've fucked fuck, i've even sucked an old mans cock, so what, and i've fucked a sheep, and i've fucked a goat, i rammed my cock right down its throat, so what, so what, you boreing little fuck- Anti-Nowhere Leauge, Metallica
• "Fuck you Kashi, I hate health food"
• "Well all of you can get fucked.-George Bush during his resignation speech
• "Drink, Girls, FECK!"- Father Jack

[edit] Proper Usage

Bill Clinton as a turd. That is why he believes in "A place called Hope"

“I'VE HAD ENOUGH WITH THESE MOTHERFUCKING LISTS ON THIS MOTHERFUCKING PAGE!”

~ Samuel L Jackson on Lists on a Page

Its versatility as a word is rarely seen in the common lexicon. It can be used as a noun:

"Damn! That fuck got away!"

As both a prefix and a suffix to a noun:

"Hey, fuckface, are you up for a dogfuck?"

As a verb:

"That dog is hot; I'd fuck her like I fucked your mom!"

In Russian Reversal:

"In Soviet Russia, goat fucks YOU!!"

As an adjective:

"That fucking Protestant won't get away with it." but they will because that how it is.

As a transitive verb:

"John fucks Shirley." and she screams.

As an intransitive verb:

"Shirley fucks." a lot, believe me.

As a place/name:

"Oh, I feel so nice in my Fuck" yes- very comfy...

As a way to command:

"Go eat shit fuckers. actually pretty tasty...

As a proper noun:

"I am Fuck! Fuck of the Mountain!" good for you

As an adverb:

"Hermes traipsed fuckfully through the leafy glade."

As an indefinite pronomina:

"How many countrys in EU do you know? Man, I don't know fuck!"

An excellent interjection between syllables (also known as an "expletive infix"):

"Abso-fucking-lutely not. That's de-fucking-licous"

As a substitute for song lyrics you can't remember:

"Billie Fuck fuck not my lover, she's just a fuck who fuck that I fuck the fuck. But fuck in the fuck fuck fuck donkey."

As a Holy Word:

"Holy Fuck!"

As a Character:

"I am fuckholeio. I need penis for my bunghole" (Beavis likes it anal, and no one knows why)

As an Interjection

"Fuck! That hurts!

As almost every word in a sentence

"Fuck the fucking fuckers fucking the fuck off.'" also, why the fuck is the fucking dogfuck fucking is your fucking fuck?

Dismissal "Why don't you go outside an play Hide-and-go-Fuck-yourself"

Greetings "Who the fuck are you?"

Dismay "Fuck it."

Trouble "I'm fucked."

Aggression "Fuck you!!!"

Demand "Fuck me!!!"

Confusion "What the fuck...?"

Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking thing."

Incompetence "He fucks up everything."

Confusion "What the fuck is going on?"

Lost "Where the fuck are we? In the middle of fucking nowhere!"

Drunk "Where the fuck am I?"/"Who the fuck am I?"/"What the fuck am I doing?"/"What the fuck did I just do?!"/"...and why the fuck do I have the lyrics to a song called Lambo-Lambo stuck in my head?!"

Lust "I'll fuck you with a rake." then actually rake, because things need to get done.

Disbelief "Unbe-fucking-lievable!!!"

More Disbelief "In-fucking-credible"

Anger "Who the fuck fucked me?"

Pain "Oh, FUCK!"

Pleasure "Oh, FUCK!"

Starting a relationship "Let's fuck now!" and then get AIDS

Quickly ending the relationship you just started: "Fuck..." found out you had AIDS didn't ya?

Sincerity "I fucking love Kamchatka."

Ignorance "Who the fuck is Alice?"

A fucking cute kitten that has absolutely nothing to do with this article. Here, cute wittuw kitty!

Hate "You Fuck!"

A poker hand "A Royal Fuck."

Denial "I didn't fucking do it."

Perplexity "I know fuck all about it."

Apathy "Who gives a fuck?"

Carelessness "Fuck that."

Resignation "Oh fuck it."

Panic "Let's get the fuck out of here!"

Directions "Fuck off."

Incestuous "Mother Fucker."

I have a headache "Go fuck yourself."

Fatigue "I'm absolutely fucked."

Nautical "Fuck the torpedos!"

Reproach "You fucking killed™ me"

Insanity "I'm fucked up, man."

Parachute malfunctions "FUCK."

In Conjunction with 'god'. "Oh My Fucking God!"

Prayer "Oh my fucking God!"

Being stabbed "Oh my fucking God!"

Being raped by an invisible man "Oh my fucking God!"

Being raped by an invisble woman "Oh My Fucking GOD! YES!"

Winning the Lottery "Oh My Fucking God!"

Losing the Lottery "Oh My Fucking God!" (especially if you spent your last few bucks on a ticket, you penniless loser)

brevity "fuck"

AAAAAAA "AAAAAAA"

Memory Loss "Where's my fucking keys!"

Anger "Jesus fucking christ!"

Demand "Get the fuck out!"

Oscar Wilde References "Fuck me up the ass, my dear!"

Thought "What's the fucking answer!?!"

Answer to a Question "Ontop of the fucking fridge!"

Rebel "Fuck the world!"

Derrogatory Statement "You team-killing fucktard!"

General Usage "Fuck."

"fuck" is now portable, you can put it in your pocket and use it on the go.

"Fuck" makes great holiday gifts, give it to your dog.

Giant freaky ass spider sent from hell to bite you found in your sink "Oh Shit, Fuck that Shit!"

Astonishment "What a shitful load of fuck??!"

Abdul - YOU KICKED MY FUCKING DOG

Holy dog-continents! I trapped my head in the fucking commode!

[edit] Rhyming words

Buck, chuck, Chuck, duck, helium, huck,ococococococoococococococuck luck, muck, puck, suck, ruck, stuck, struck, tuck, truck, yuck, goerge, orange and gdubabonguchuck, all rhymes with fuck.

In hockey: "Where's the thing that rhymes with a swear word?" or "Where's the thing that you use in hockey, rhymes with a swear word?" or "Where's the thing that you use in hockey, rhymes with a F-word?" or simply "Where's the thing that rhymes with a bad word?"

Driving, buying or renting a vehicle other than a car: "I need a vehicle that rhymes with a swear word" or "I need a vehicle that rhymes with the F-word" or simply "I need a vehicle that rhymes with a bad word"

A persons who's name is Chuck: "Where's the guy that rhymes with a swear word" or "Where's the guy that rhymes with a F-word" or "Where's the guy that rhymes with a bad word" and other usage as "Can I talk to a guy that rhymes with a swear word?" or "Can I talk to a guy that rhymes with the F-word?" or simply "Can I talk to a guy that rhymes with a bad word?".

Going fishing, sailing or hiking in the lake: "Take a look at the animal that rhymes with a swear word!" or "Take a look at the animal that rhymes with the F-word!" or "Take a look at the animal that rhymes with a bad word!" and "Can I take a look at the animal that rhymes with a swear word, (any person)?" or "Can I take a look at the animal that rhymes with the F-word, (any person)?" or "Can I take a look at the animal that rhymes with a or word, (any person)?", etc.

WFT?

[edit] See Also

• What the fuck?
• Jesus
• Your Mom
• Flying fuck
• Rush Limbaugh Is A Fucking Fat Bastard
• Four Letter Word
• HAHAHA
• Fucked up
• Fuck everything
• Fucky
• The art of fucking without fucking

[edit] External Links

• Dissertation on the word Fuck