Fursecution

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It is beautiful, it is fine, it is the noblest form of affection. There is nothing unnatural about it. It is intellectual, and....they do WHAT?!

~ Oscar Wilde on Furries

Fursecution is any form of irrational hostility or discrimination aimed at furries. While the term's etymology is uncertain, it entered common usage after being used in a speech by notable Unitarian minister/witch doctor and civil rights leader ShadowFox69 during the "Selma to Midwest Furfest" march of 2003. The term has since been used to describe countless crimes too terrible to mention(e.g. the cold-blooded banning of 8 furries from the SomethingAwful forums in October 2005.) 4Chan, despite inventing the modern furry, hates them fully.

Mahatma Gandhi, with pronounced manboobs.
Mahatma Gandhi, with pronounced manboobs.

Contents

[edit] Crimes committed against furries

Allied propagandists put about rumours that Hitler was himself a furry. With pronounced manboobs.
Allied propagandists put about rumours that Hitler was himself a furry. With pronounced manboobs.

[edit] THE HOLOCAUST

The most notable historical incident of fursecution is the Holocaust. This campaign of mass-execution and torture led to the deaths of approximately 6 million furries. As this was before the internet, many furries were outside of their mom's basement when the roundups began. Few were spared. While there is limited documentation regarding the Holocaust's beginnings, it is known to have started after German Dictator Adolf Hitler allegedly discovered a man in a golden-retriever fursuit sodomizing his beloved dog Blondi. After Hitler's defeat by the furry fandom-loving nations of the world, the few remaining furries lobbied the United Nations for the formation of a nation of their own in which they could build a new life for themselves. in this Second Life the furries hoped to be able to live, yiff, and raise their litters in peace.

[edit] Jayren

Jayren, A modern day Rosa Parks.
Jayren, A modern day Rosa Parks.

Jayren, a "roleplaying anal oral transforming voyeur zoophile machinist mind-control microphile macrophile electrical watersports painless chemical open-minded available male-biased ageplaying male child" known as "Alan J. Yoder" to mudanes, was caught in the act of coitus with the love of his life, his dog lucky, in 2004. Jayren was forced to undergo fursecution by the law and by PETA, claiming that his relationship with Lucky was not consensual. Despite this discrimination, Jayren heroically defied the law and continued to proudly yiff everything within his sight.

On November 17, 2006, Jayren was sentenced to 18 months in jail for aggravated assault. In addition to this outrage, Jayren was only allowed use of a Gateway 2000 with AOL 5.0 and a dial-up connection. Needless to say, this was not nearly adequate for him to fully enjoy Second Life and interact with the vast online furry community. Neither Amnesty International nor the ACLU agreed to defend him, likely because even they were afraid of the power wielded by the agents of fursecution in our culture.

Fortunately, despite scritching his guards on several occasions, Jayren was released from prison on October 12, 2007. Whether he will be able to continue his relationship with Lucky however, remains to be seen.

[edit] Put the FUR back in FURY

  • WikiFur — A highly accurate and grammatically-correct resource.
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