Grammar Police
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Der Speziellegrammatikpolizei (also known the SGP, or just Grammar Police) were formed in the early 19th Century as a response to perceived softening of the stance of the Illuminati towards grammar treachery in England, Scotland and Wales. Their current chair is Lynne Truss, formerly of the Women's League of Language Purity.
[edit] The 20th Century - A Century Of Decay
The 20th Century was not an auspicious time for the SGP. Although membership in England continued to rise, due to the relatively higher standards of education and drunken apathy membership of the Scottish branch atrophied at the beginning of the Soviet Era in Northern Britain, never to recover. Some historians have noted that their parent organisation, the revered and infallible Illuminati, were threaten by the SGP's credibility and worked to discredit and sabotage their efforts to impose Prescriptive Unity (also known as The Final Conjugation) on the English language. Working with their colleagues in France, at the Comrades' Committee For Linguistic Purity, they built underground connections all over Europe and exploited mercilessly the emerging European Economic Community for their own ends.
As the Century approached its end, however, shadowy forces emerged from hiding, ushering in a new era of ultra-conformism.
[edit] The 21st Century - The Rise To Prominence
During the txt spk wrz OMG m8! of the early 21st Century, a bloody and turgid time for the SGP which coincided with a new era of Toff Rule in the British Isles, their influence grew rapidly and key SGP apparatchiks began to reconnect with their old Illuminati colleagues in the British and European governments. By the early 2010s, with roots extending all over Western Europe, The United States and Laos, the SGP controlled an annual operating budget larger than the entire wealth of the Southern Hemisphere and employed more people than existed in the world at that time.
The organisation's resources are currently over-committed in the LOLsp33k skirmishes and many of their divisions are still fighting a rearguard action against l33t sp33k on the Eastern Front, particularly in the sensitive areas around Melnik and Sofia.
[edit] Structure
The Grammar Police is an object-oriented, strongly-typed organisation usually deployed client-side to utilise Illuminati APIs. Although it is possible to use it to build standalone organisations and committees, SGP's strict inbuilt error-checking is usually seen to render it too cumbersome for such work and are usually deployed within an object model. They do not expose any of their attributes or functions publicly, and are defined by obfuscated Brainfuck


