Grand Theft Auto: Norway
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- This article is under construction and not recommended for anybody that is considered Normal. To fully understand, I suggest reading through Black Metal first as the game is produced under them and will only distribute 666 Copies.
Grand Theft Auto: Norway is a new GTA game currently in development, no pictures have been released so far but here are the details of the game so far:
Contents |
[edit] Story
The story begins when you take control of the infamous Varg Vikernes, you start off in prison talking to this old man with only 1 eye called Odin about how he ended up here. Varg cannot buy anything because stuff in Norway is so fucking expensive,therefore he must steal cars. Odin offers him another chance to recreate the events, and in exchange Varg will become an Einherjar in Valhalla and fight in the battle of Ragnarok.
This is when the user first takes control, at first you start off with the Kid type jobs such as terrorising old Christian grannies, beating up Jewhova Whiners. Then as the story progresses you gain access to the burning churches series gaining your media attention (Which you pretend to not really want but actually you do) and summoning of the Ancient Magics.
It's a stupid fake story,and there's no edition like this.
[edit] Vehicles
A wide range of vehicles will be available in the game. Here are a few examples. Because Norway has no copyright or trademark legislation, the game intends to use the original names.
- A 11th Century Viking boat
- A 1972 Troll automobile.
- A 1944 Wehrmacht-issue Panzer VI B Tiger II
- A 1967 Den Beste Sykkel bicycle.
- A 1948 old woman named "Anne-Gudrun".
- A 1984 Audi police car
- A 1985 Land Rover Defender with roof cage to store corpses
- A true norwegian necrogoat. (Year of production unknown)
- Turbonegro's Tour Bus
- A 1975 Moped
- A 1992 Opel Vectra
- A 1991 Nissan Sunny
- The pink Ole-Ivars bus
- The Monkees mobile
- A 1987 SAAB 900 Turbo. This is the fastest car in the game
- Lots of Volvos that cannot be destroyed.
[edit] Characters
Varg Vikernes (Formally known as Kristian) - Varg is the main character of the game, little is known about his motives as he suffers from Cult Of Personality and Multiple Personalities, his best friend is Euronigger in which taught him how to play the blues, later on he became a Nazi and such things made him want to kill him
Gaahl - Gaahl is one of the bad guys, remaining silent for several hours whenever you have to converse with him, forcing your pawns to drink their blood, and painting pictures so foul that civilians die upon seeing them.
Euronigger - Euronigger is 1 of the Gangsta Jews of Norway, rather than being like most Darkies he plays Black Metal and the Blues, he taught Varg the ways of the kvlt.
Hendrix - One of the first people who you talk to after getting out, he is joined in your quest but is trying to find a way to Germany(Grand Theft Auto: Germany), rumour has it that he has the best selection of Weapons.
Isahn - Ishan is the chinese-norwegian god that has come to help Varg in his quest, he offers a great selection of BLARRKK GRYMM HORZEZ, and has a few issues he with the Church he needs to rid. There a rumours on the internets that he is the infamous Black Wizard of New Orleans, whether this is true or not is yet to be disputed.
Fenriz - The Leader of the KKK, Varg has close relations with him but he has heard rumours that Fenriz will betray him after certain events.
Abbath - Abbath is the Demon of the Mighty Ravendark, he flys across Norway on his mighty Dragon of the Very Very Northern Mountains of the Grim North.
Per Nils Kurt - One of the fat cats in the church arson underground society. Rambles eccentric, pyromaniac-like ideas about such illicit activities that this underground organisation is dedicated to. Varg has to Samoth escape from a maximun security penitentiary just to ignite him with a flamethrower near the end of the game.
Svarte Arne - Lead singer of the a Fucking Grim and Tru Necro Norsk Arisk Blækk Mettal band called: Fucking Grim and Tru Necro Norsk Arisk Blækk Mettal.
Aladdin - Your partner in the game. All he really does is follow you around and make funny noises.
[edit] Gangs
Note - Due to Vargs Multiple personallities, Vargs stance on the gangs changes on a very rapid basis.
Ravendark Horde - These are the people found in the Very Very Northern Mountains of the North, there leader Abbath followed by his henchman Demonaz and Horgh, have taken over the mountains in effort to destroy Helsinki, Sweden. They produce random Choirs of Drunken Head banging to confuse the people into thinking they are Grim and Frostbitten. Their main rivals are the Orc legions.
Legion Of Orcs - The legions of the orcs live in the Caves of the fairly Northern moutains, just on the outskirts of the main area Bergen, all though they are mostly Orcs they have allied with the Trolls Goblins and Aryan Goats, nobody know what the hell they want but they like to eat sheep and molest their corpses.
ABBA - A mysterious group of Swedes that try to take over your hood in one of the later levels.
Die Apokalyptischen Reiter - A group of Germans who makes heavy metal versions of 1970's disco songs.
Legions Of Perkele - A group of fucking angry finnish people who want to destroy the swedes for taking Helsinki, they operate from the finnish capital, Toijala. They supply Varg with maps to find vynils, they also support the Ravendark Horde.
[edit] Sequel
In 2004 Rockstar Games created a long awaited sequel/spinoff to this game. The name of it is "GTA: Nokas Stories" and uses the same graphic engine as this game. In the sequel you star as David Toska one bankrobber of an infameous robber band. Your objectives vary from robbing banks and killing police officers to stealing fameous paintings. The game caracter has David Toska likeness and voice. Samuel L. Jackson has also lend his likeness to your ally corrupt police officer Oluf. The soundtrack of this game is mostly from the Black Metal, mostly by Jackson himself.
[edit] Bonus Missions
Collecting rare Vinyls: In this mission, there were 100 missing vinyls that the church sent out to burn, your job is to collect all of them which will give you access to Euronigga's store in which you can access all the game music and produce his Ambient projects, other than that there are some other items you can unlock at Vargs apartment:
- 10 Vinyls - The Knife (used to kill Euronigger previously)
- 20 Vinyls - The Lord Of The Rings Sword
- 30 Vinyls - The Lord Of The Rings Bow and Arrow Set
- 40 Vinyls - Assualt Rifle
- 50 Vinyls - Sniper Rifle
- 60 Vinyls - Mighty Viking Sword
- 70 Vinyls - A New Stereo
- 88 Vinyls - The Satanic Pagan Skinhead Costume
- 90 Vinyls - Blashyrk (Mighty Ravendark Dragon)
- 100 Vinyls - Euroniggas Record store
[edit] Screenshots
As we can see, the game is going to be in black-and-white.
 Abbath preparing to attack |
 Varg riding a bike |
 Road to the northern mountains |
 Varg just about to kill a Transvestite |
[edit] See also
| Grand Theft Auto | ||
| Games | ||
| The Lost Games | Lego Island | Cosmo | Poop City | Tatooine | Television City | Television City 2 | Television City 3 - The Wrath Of Dob | Borat vs Bush | |
| Grand Theft Auto III era | III | San Andreas | Advance | San Andreas Stories | |
| Grand Theft Auto: We're Running Out of Ideas era | New Zealand | Toronto | Hill Valley | Theft Under A Thousand | Sunnyvale Trailer Park | Baghdad | Beirut | New Orleans | Vatican City | Vatican City Stories | Springfield | Australia | Antarctica | Grand Theft Auto: Nickelodeon City | Grand Theft Auto: Weinerville | Grand Theft Auto: Nick Rebellion | Grand Theft Auto: Somalia | |
| Currently in Production | Afghanistan | Baghdad Stories | Germany | Heaven | Jerusalem | Norway | Philippines | Santiago | Venice | |
| Non-canonical | Grand Theft Audio | Grand Theft Election: Bush v. Gore | |
