Greggorio

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Greggorio is an underground city, located 12 miles beneath the surface of Vatican City. Greggorio is believed to be single-handedly responsible for the downfall of Catholicism, which started in the year 2031, and ended in the year 2034 and came about with the assassination of Pope Yurtin the Fourth, whom acted like a cornerstone to the religion. The Greggorians are believed to have been plotting the assassination of Pope Yurtin the Fourth since the year 1912 (eastern time) and the walls of the city have been lined with elaborate blueprints ever since.

Contents 1 Exports 2 Population 3 History 4 Destruction of Catholicism

[edit] Exports

Greggorio exports solely to Vishnu at the center of the Earth while he toils away working to keep the earth in orbit. Greggorio's most prominent export is iced-tea, which is Vishnu's favorite drink. The Greggorians labor constantly to keep Vishnu supplied with his iced-tea, because otherwise, the Earth's orbit would fail to continue, and that is just bad news for everybody. Other exports supplied by Greggorio include soil (they're big on that one), fuzzy slippers that resemble squirrels and such, and very strong whisky

[edit] Population

It is estimated that the population of Greggorio is somehwere around 122,452,009. Because nobody has actually ever been to Greggorio, a mathematical formula has been devised to create the best possible estimate. The formula is done by taking the size of Vatican City (.17 sq mi) and multiplying it by the number of people that hate Christians. After this figure has been obtained, a man in a random office building will think of a random nine diget number, and this number will be used to represent the population of Greggorio.

The people of Greggorio are normally a bizarre combination of Eskimo and Demon, although there are some that have traces of horse, which in the end looks simply like a sin against man. It is believed that the Greggorians were forced to live underground because they were far to hideous to live on the surface. The surface has been reserved for the beautiful people, not filfthy demonic Eskimos.

[edit] History

Although there are no records or credible evidence supporting these claims, it is now a widely accepted fact that the Greggorian people arose when an Eskimo, that was chasing a narwhale underneath the ice (as eskimo's are so prone to do) fell into a portal that led to hell. While in this portal, the Eskimo, who we will refer to as Glenda, found Satan. Satan was astonished to find an intruder in his domain, so he did what any of us would do.........he raped that Eskimo until she almost bled to death. 17 minutes later (demon seed is very quick) the first Greggorian was born. This Greggorian, who was too ugly to even be viewed by Satan himself, even too ugly to be viewed in Nederland, was forced to live in the worst place possible, which just happened to be 12 miles beneath Vatican City. From here, the first Greggorian (whom was self-named) began to dig and dig until he had a giant cavern to live in, at which point he vomited. His vomit appeared to be a second Greggorian, and from here on the city began to expand almost exponentially, and that is how the Greggorians came to be.

[edit] Destruction of Catholicism

In 1912, the Greggorians decided that they were going to destroy the pope and Catholicism after they realized that the Catholic church did not recognize Vishnu as an actual God, nor did they respect demons or eskimos as actual people. The grotesque Eskidemons, or Greggorians decided to put an end to the Catholic reign of terror, and they decided that they needed to kill the pope and collapse all of Catholicism. The exact execution of the plan is unclear, but we do know that it involved 400 yards of sturdy rope, 19 low-caliber fire arms, one oversized novelty hammer, and four sets of clogs. The exact recap of the story was lost in the great-world fire of 2043, and over the years the story has been lost.