Heterosexuality
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“Tried it once or twice. Rather monotonous after a while.”
~ Oscar Wilde on heterosexuality
Heterosexuality is a small principality perched on a rock in rural Bury St Edmunds. Thought by the Republican Party of the United States of Terrorism to be a paragon of moral civility, it is in fact populated by hairy neanderthals who grunt a lot and hit each other with sticks. Heterosexuals have now been ethnically cleansed everywhere in America except the Southern United States, where they live in ghettos known as trailer parks. Their natural predator is the homosexual which stalks them cunningly in gyms and wedding socials in an attempt to absorb them into the gay agenda. Some heterosexuals have resisted the predation by forming a special force called religious fundamentalism but this has only led to even more clever tactics in the form of "oops, silly me, I dropped the soap".
[edit] Geography
Due to its position in a tremendously rocky landscape, the principality is riddled with deep furrows and high peaks, many of them insurmountable, at least to the men who live there. In the centre of the principality is Mount Woman. Standing at 200,000 feet in height the male residents of the principality have a regular ritual in which they get drunk and try to reach the summit of the mountain, however none have managed it to this date.
There are also two chief rivers in the principality, the River Bi into which many of the men fall once they are too drunk and have failed to conquer Mount Woman, and the River Denial that leads to Egypt.
[edit] Flora and Fauna
Nothing is known about these two ladies in the principality. If anyone knows of their whereabouts they should contact the Heterosexuality Metropolitan Police with information.
[edit] People
The population of Heterosexuality currently stands (admittedly with half of them dragging their knuckles on the floor) at 520, though numbers are dwindling with constant invasions from neighbouring Lesbos taking their women away. The people can be roughly split into two main categories:
- Male - the majority of the population of Heterosexuality are male, though many are actually in Denial (yes that river again). Men from Heterosexuality are tall, disturbingly hairy, with high foreheads and little in the way of brain. Their chief language is Uuu!r which consists mainly of variations of two words, "Urgh", and "Woman". They are known to have erections whenever they see another set of lesbians kissing each other, and becoming more of a heterosexual by fucking them
- Female - an increasing minority in the population of Heterosexuality are female, who have bored looks on their faces. Many females from Heterosexuality are captured by invading Lesbians though some fight back because of their quest for treasure in the Plains of Bay-Be. Femal hetereosexuals also like to masturbate with men, and common words are, "Ketchup", "Mustard", "Straw", and "Rotary Engine".
