Hot
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“Concentrate and ask again.”
~ Magic 8-Ball on whether your mom is hot
(Actual Definition)
"Hotness"
1
An expression often used if a person or other item lacks the warmth of life. For instance, "Gah! You're friggin hot!". Or "Gah! Ingrid Hage is hot!" Love from Philippe Boutros! your dearly beloved!
2 Can also be used to express a quick rate of decay. For instance, "Don't eat the meat, it's hot." "My grandmother is so hot!"
3 Unit of measurement.
4 An adjective used to describe likeliness of expansion in the phallus of a male caused by the mere presence of a female. Often rated on a scale of one to ten, based on the percentage chance (1=10%) that the phallus will enlarge. Hot(s) are quite helpful in getting laid.
5 Also an adjective to describe Halle Berry or Nelly Furtado both of whom through the production of Fartium have achieved temperatures hotter than the surface of the sun reaching critical ass.
6 One of the five classical loathing elements, which rules over spooky and cold elements, and is in turn ruled over by sleaze and stench.
7 Emily & Adam.
8 Oirxcat and Xeda.
9 Fire.
10 OSCAR WILDE
“That's hot!”
~ Paris Hilton on the inside of an oven
“It's pretty hot.”
~ That Guy on Australia and its citizenry
“I'm hot cuz I'm fly, you ain't cuz you not.”
“You stole mah rhyme, bitch!”
~ Mims on Oscar Wilde
[edit] History of Hottness
Hottness was first experimented with by female cavemen two years before they were born. Though quite miserable at being hot, they were able to plant the seeds for years to come. By the time the Egyptians were around, some females were able to achieve a reasonable degree of hottness. The Ancient Greeks, though often queer, also were adept at recognizing that hottness usually increases as the amount of clothing decreases. This is why statues were often done in nudity. Then comes the Dark Ages. Christianity had become a powerful force, and said that nude bodies could not be seen in the light. This is why the period was known as the Dark Ages, lights were turned off whenever possible for attempts at viewing something Hot. More recently, Hot has neared perfection in such instances as Jessica Alba, Carmen Electra KYLE MUCERINO ,Nick Pufpaf Oirxcat, Xeda and Lindsay Lohan's boobs.
A Hot is the relative distance one has to sit away from a fire divided by the diameter of a fire. The Sun being 868,750 miles across and 93,000,000 miles away from Earth therefore has a measure of 107 Hots.
Note: Whilst Maria Sharapova my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard.may be considered to be very hot, the actual distance that the average gent would like to be away from her is very small. She therefore has a measurement of less than 1 Hot
See Also : The Hot Paradox as applied to women
