Iced Earth
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An Iced Earth is a perfect replica of the present-day world, frozen and covered in chocolate frosting. The top-selling product of the company World Foods, it remains the treat of choice for planet-sized monsters throughout the universe. An Iced Earth currently retails for a year's agreement to not decimate the planet, although the limited edition Iced Bizzaro-Earth, where Communism reigns supreme and the chocolate frosting is replaced by vanilla sells for a two year agreement.
[edit] History
The story of Iced Earth is, in many ways, the story of our entire supercapitalist age. It was known ever since Stephen Hawking invented the Transgizmonic Replimum that it was possible to create exact replicas of Planet Earth easily and efficiently, and wasn't long before the governments of the world realised they provided an effective bargaining tool with supervillains. Thus, whenever a mad scientist or sentient vortex from beyond threatened to destroy the world, the government would simply allow them to destroy a specially created replica, on the condition that they then didn't return to the original earth for a designated period of time. This turned out to be an ingenious plan, and within five years the need for superheroes was utterly eliminated, and the world entered a glorious new era free of reliance on self-righteous men in pants.
It was, however, the 1994 G8 Summit in Gotham that truly made the Iced Earth possible. There, the world's leaders realised that, while replicas of earth could be given to supervillans in the event of their attack, it was also possible to sell them in times of peace. Furthermore, by making the replicas more attractive, say by changing their women's biological makeup so that twisted, balding men were all they found attractive, or by bending their laws of reality so that ludicrously complex plans for world domination would effortlessly succeed, they were able to command a extremely high price, and as such banish the fear of supervillans returning to earth forever. Following this decision, World Foods PLC was set up, with Iced Earth as its flagship product, and it proved successful from its introduction to the present day.
[edit] Iced Earth Trivia
Iced Earth is also a relatively unknown Samoan Tribe regularly practising in Corroborees in foreign deserts such as Wacken. Recently Tim "Ripper" Owens took over as head tribesman and has since then been dictating the tribe's fate and writing all of their chants and cultural dances. However the mindless tribesmen still jeer for their former Head Of Council; Mat Barlow. THis rioting is in vain though as Samoan God Jon Schaffer has spoken forward that Barlow shall never return to the Iced Earth and shall bide his time in the Pyramaze on Planet Ego.
But, later, Barlow came back with an army and sent Tim Ripper to the Pyramaze. Then, Barlow made the decision to move the tribe to Antarctica so they can master the art of cold foreign deserts...
