Infinite Improbability Drive

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Jump to: navigation, search

The Infinite Improbability Drive (I.I.D.) is a new method of road-and-space travel that does away with the mucking about in Hyperspace and the annoying task of having to change gears every six seconds.

Contents

[edit] Invention

Created in 1979 by Astrophysicist, Beachwear Model and Superhero Douglas Adams, the I.I.D. opens up every wormhole in the Universe at once to act as a shortcut to your destination rather than waste valuable time and fuel fucking about with Hyperspace co-ordinates and waiting for the middle-lane to clear.

[edit] How it Works

The I.I.D. runs on a special Chronaton manipulation device that allows the passage of your car or spaceship (or Spacecar, for those of you with Chinese models) through the very heart of the Universe by mind-boggingly stretching the very fabric of the Universe to a point where it reaches Infinite Improbability, where things are not impossible, just very, very improbable. Because of this, it is very important to dress accordingly. The I.I.D. was invented based on the Theory of Finite Improbability, which is used to break the ice at parties, simply by making the molecules of the hostess's undergarments leap out exactly one foot to the left. Leading scientists were quite fed up with that, mostly because they weren't invited to those sort of parties.

[edit] The I.I.D. in Popular Culture

There have been many celebrities, politicians and professionals who have acquired the I.I.D. purely as a publicity stunt to get in the latest rag or because they like to have all the latest gadgets in their car. Among these include:

Originally, Douglas Adams was going to sue the Planners for the use of his invention in Plan 8 from Outer Space, but because of product placement, canceled the idea and Jumped headfirst and buck-naked into the nearest pile of cash he could find.

[edit] Sales

Because of it's fast passage through the very core of life itself, the I.I.D. is fast replacing Hyperspace as the best form of transport despite being quite expensive. In turn, this is being replaced by Bistromathics, though this is even more complicated and mind-numbing than either Hyperspace or the I.I.D.

Personal tools
In other languages
projects