Invisible Man
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“Wait! Who are we talking about?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Invisible Man
“Who?”
~ Chuck Norris on Invisible Man
“I can't see him.”
~ Captain Obvious on Invisible Man
“If I can't do it, you can't do it!”
~ Invisible man on becoming invisible
“If I was Invisible...”
~ Clay Aiken on being invisible
“You (who don't know me) should just go!”
~ Invisible man on everyone that tries to acknowledge him
“We will catch you!”
~ Ghostbusters on Invisible Man
“When I close my eyes it's you I see...”
~ Michelle Branch on Invisible Man
“I...I don't know what to say!”
~ Everybody on Invisible Man
“I can escape from Sylar when I think of you...”
~ Peter Petrelli on Invisible Man
“I pity the fool!”
~ Mr.T on Invisible Man
Invisible man is a man that is unseen.
When you want to see the invisible man, you're dumb - cause basically you can't see him! Hahahahhahaha....
Contents |
[edit] The History of Invisible Man
Invisible man was born in the dark age, where no light can be seen (which implies that everything is unseen). His father had an arranged marriage with his mom, so their life is not as sweet as any other family.
There were rumors that he knows all the tidbits and pieces of knowledge that exists in the known universe, and will push people towards lockers when angered. When throwing a tantrum, he won't talk to anybody for a whole day, which is ironic, for he is invisible and no one can see him (or even want to talk to him for that matter).
Because of his invisibility, he always thinks that he is above the rest. He is arrogant, selfish, and thinks he can get away with everything, all because of his invisibility. However, as an effect of this invisibility, his manners, intelligence, and speech are also largely invisible, or nonexistent.
In the English Oxford Encyclopedia, he is categorized as a Jackass.
[edit] Known Personal Data on Invisible Man
Name: unknown
Age: 999
Sex: Never
Orientation: Bisexual. Some argue that he might be a pedophile, zoophiliac and necrophiliac. Quantum Physicist even insist that he's a hermaphrodite.
Occupation: Annoying people, Have a go at girl's changing room, wasting air and space in our beloved mother earth
Lifetime Aspiration: To raise family standard
Notable Skill: Being Invisible
Favorite animal: Chameleon
[edit] Facts about Invisible Man
- Adored by Clay Aiken for being an inspiration by being invisible
- He doesn't fear anyone, and nobody fears him since we can't actually see him
- Living proof that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree
- Loves Papercut, but the papercut does not feel the same way
- Knows nothing to say (which implies the invisible part of his name)
- Has the ugliest laughter you will ever know (if you can hear it)
- Has inspired the movie 'Hollow Man' and the creation of the character 'Skinner' in LXG
- Able to finish things in 15 seconds (if he even does anything)
- When you are walking with the Invisible Man, you are walking alone
- WeHn hiE tyeps oN the kayboard, eitT alhwaYs caMes ouUt" ass a TyPoe, sainCe hHes hEAnds aRr inVEisAbeL
- He comes from France
- He hates the way you sing, despite his inability to produce audible sounds
- Has thought further than anyone that has ever existed (mirror yourself invisible man - whoops, if you can see yourself!)
- Do not attempt to play ball with him for he will break his hand.
- Was the perpetrator of the bombing of the Bali Nine
- Had his parents' marriage arranged
- Considers computer Firewall a physical security (which implies that any degree of intelligence is invisible)
- Loves Ben Affleck, since Ben's acting abilities are as invisible as he is
- When he plays basketball, one team will be one man short
- Man of the Invisibirity does speak on bloken Engrish (happen because man is the invisibre in brain pour)
- Speaks in a gurgled, unfunny, and irritating accent, if we can actually hear it
- When he runs, he flaps his arms in an attempt to be aerodynamic
- Vanity is the Invisible Man's most favorite sin
- He thinks that everyone's work is brief, not knowing how 'brief' his existence is...
- He blames other people for making him invisible (but no one cared...)
- He's a trend-setter. When he changes, everyone changes (too bad everyone already thought about it)
- He is not in this room right now
- He thinks car collisions are elastic (which implies that any degree of intelligence is invisible)
- His picture is all over this article, even in the backgrounds. Can you see him?
- He is Freddie Mercury
- He shot the sheriff.
[edit] If you can see the Invisible Man...
... then you are a liar, cause you can't.
[edit] Achievements Achieved by The Invisible Man
- Being invisible
- A trial TOEFL Score of 580
- Can bypass the best of motion-sensing security systems
- Able to lose more friends than he can make (by being invisible)
- Doing Business with logic
- Entering numbers to a calculator
- Able to befriend Casper and the Thirteen Ghosts
- Pioneered the stealth camouflage technology (by being invisible)
- Designed the blueprints for stealth bombers and stealth fighters
- Finished his Master's degree in 9 minutes, 15 seconds
Unfortunately, any such proof of said achievements are invisible. So, he hasn't achieved anything.
[edit] The Theory of Inexistence: The Invisible Man
There has been a theory going around that revolves around the idea that the Invisible Man does not exist. It is proven by some of the following points:
- Nobody actually saw a real Invisible man
- The Invisible Man himself has not yet seen himself
- Every time someone said they saw the Invisible Man, it can't be proven
- Invisibility is an impossibility
- Photos depicting the Invisible Man, ended up as a blur negative
- Everyone disavows the knowledge of his existence
This theory has baffled many scientists and scholars alike since it deals with the mystery of the truth about the Invisible man. Yet some scholars said it is proven that..., wait..., who are we exactly talking about again? The Invisible Man? Who? What is an Invisible Man? I don't think such things exists. They are just figments of your nightmare and imagination.
Oh well, since there's nothing at all to discuss, I guess I should go back to work then. Wait..., where's my USB?
[edit] Pictures of the Invisible Man
Several photographs have been taken depicting the shape of said Invisible Man. Here are some of the more authentic sightings.
[edit] Trivia
- Made various guest spots in The OC, When Harry Met Sally, Superman, Citizen Kane and Mean Girls. His role was uncreditted.
- Is Invisible.
- Aimed to go to National University, but ended up in an infamous college.
- Can't be seen.
- Spotted by Peter Petrelli.
