It doesn't matter what your answer is so long as you feel good about it math

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The Liberal agenda decided that Barbie was right, and that "Math is hard", and that the number of High School dropouts has been increasing. Math was replaced with New Math, and then suddenly, any answer was a good answer.

When given the question:

"Johnny has two Apples, Susie has three Apples, if Susie gave Johnny two Apples, then Johnny would have how many Apples?"

The following were given as answers:

• 4 - hmm... wait, I'm too smart for this site, I'll leave it right now and I'll use Google to find some online IQ test.
• Hey, it's me again. Guess what! I got 4 points on the IQ test(out of 200). Such an irony... I should answer '200' on the question about the apples...
• "42"

• "69"
• "1337"
• "1776"

• "Apple juice!"

• "mmm... apples..."

• "3"

• "I am George W. Bush. That's Dubya with a Double U."

• "Wow, dude, wanna smoke another one of these apple stems? This is like, totally, so far out."

• "The apples should be freed from the hands of the capitalist opressors and distributed evenly among the people."

• "Dude, my dad owns a dealership!"

• "Not enough, so he'd beat up Suzie, then grab her apple AND both her melons."

• "What are these apples of which you speak?"

• "I once tripped over a naked lady in mexico."

• "BLASPHEMY!"

• "In Soviet Russia, apple eats YOU!!"

• "let's see... one apple, two apples, errrrrrr.. plus one, two. it's three, no wait.. errr.. is it... ah crap i lost it!!!!

“4.”

~ Oscar Wilde on the aforementioned question.

Under this New Math all of these answers were correct, so long as the students giving them feel good about them. This is how the "It doesn't matter what your answer is so long as you feel good about it" part of New Math works, as invented by the Liberal educators.

Conservatives got upset, and said that Creationism should be taught instead of New Math, because it does not support their agenda of having more intelligently designed voters. They claimed the Liberals want to dumb down America with this New Math in order to fool voters into voting for Satan.

I kind of agree, said GI JOE, who had a hand in inventing New Math. He accused Cobra of using Pseudoscience to make high school students stupid and thus fool them into voting for Osama bin Laden. Not so, spoke John Kerry, who used this as his platform when he ran for US President in 2004. Kerry claimed all that really matters is a person's feelings, and if they have bad feelings about getting a Math problem wrong, then they will be unhappy and depressed. That it is a person's feelings that make them stupid or not, and that a happy person is a stupid person. Kerry said, "While I may look like a horse, it is common horse sense to support New Math and good feelings that come with it."

Conservatives understand that the only way to do math (or anything else) is by rote memorization. This, in combination with standard tests that mainly test a young person's ability to regurgitate facts, ensure that No Child is Left Behind.