JUG

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This student didn't have his shirt tucked in.

“Thats Juggable.”

~ Oscar Wilde on some kid who just punched another kid in his spleen.

“Jug!”

~ Dean Martin on what he says when giving JUG to kids.

“Whaaat? Why? Ugh...”

~ Someone on being given a JUG.

“Faster you cruel little children!!”

~ God on watching JUG.

JUG stands for Justice Under God and was invented by God after witnessing the horrors that Catholic/Jesuit/Christian schoolteachers have to go through each day when trying to teach. JUG is one of the leading punishments assigned to unruly children as approved by the Uber-Christians Association and is employed in many schools around the Earth.

1 Why not much is known about JUG
2 The Survivor Josey Wales
3 Who gives JUG to students?
4 See Also

[edit] Why not much is known about JUG

Survivors on JUG have little information of what happens during the JUG process, but it is rumored among the tormentors that there is nothing that goes on otherwise. On May the 32nd... this all changed when Josey Wales announced that he could recount what happened in JUG without getting seizures in the process.

[edit] The Survivor Josey Wales

Josey Wales recounted what went on the whole 40 minutes he was stuck in Jug. Josey said many groundbreaking truths such as ...

"They made us sit there on top of our textbooks while sitting up straight the whole time.
"It was freaking hot the first twenty minutes, we were forced to keep all of our stuff on, ya'know like our suit jackets, ties, coats if we didn't take them off before we came in. The two teachers at the desk had T-shirts on and were sipping Cherry Cokes out of glasses with ice!!
"I swear that the one with the sunglasses...whats his name...you know the Anthropology guy who teaches the seniors, yeah him, I swear on my life that when Jim went to go to the bathroom I heard That guy whispered *fuckhead* when he left the room!!
The teachers said no drugs even though they were smoking dope.
"We went outside after twenty minutes of waiting... then we were supposed to walk around in a big oblong circle for the next twenty minutes while still wearing the same clothes on. We could't even loosen our ties!!"
"You probably won't believe this... but he actually let one or two kids out early, what a jerk I tell ya, he could have let us all out."
"We were allowed to take off our shirts...which sucked because then they whipped us."
"When one kid sneezed the dean made him carry his book bag while walking around the circle."
"When the fatter teacher farted he went "AAAHHHHH" and farted again before leaving for the bathroom...which he didn't return from."

[edit] Who gives JUG to students?

Well most of the time its either teachers or the dean. Some teachers won't give JUG at all, because they probably used to get JUG and don't want to see their students suffering like they did. The bad teachers are who you need to watch out for. They're the ones who come in every day, take attendance, tell no jokes and forbid all jokes, and get right to work. One can immediately recognize a bad teacher if he gives JUG on the First day of classes (which is like every kid in the school being drunk) or if he ever has given class JUG. When a bad teacher is absent you can usually tell by how many kids are saying "Yo, Mr. Anonymous isn't here today" which gets two replies, one reply being along the lines of "YESSSSS, I don't have him!!!" or the other being "Oh good, because I didn't study for the test and/or didn't do any homework".