Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/July 20

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July 20: Window Licking Day (Scotland)

• 2000 B.C. - Window Licking Day was born as Cavemouth Licking Day.
• 1 - Jesus learned to walk.
• 1270 - Baberaham Lincoln frees the peasents.
• 1712 - Riot Day is proclaimed a national holiday in Great Britain.
• 1873 - A peasant in a poor country licked a window and saw an image of the Virgin Mary. He then started eBay to sell it on the Interweb.
• 1874-present - Once a year, every year, peasants in poor countries see an image of the Virgin Mary in a window after being licked on Window Licking Day, except for 1947, when the image was seen on a cinnamon bun.
• 1969 - Louis Armstrong and Buzz Lightyear become the first men to do the moonwalk, when Apollo 11 splashes down in the Sea of Tranquillity.
• 1974 - Turkeys invade Cyprus.
• 2008 - George W. Bush licks a frosted window. Gets stuck. Proceeds to flail his arms in a circular motion.
• 2014 - An astronaut tries to celebrate this day by licking a window of a space shuttle .... from the outside.
• 5678 - Eminem's disembodied head's latest album goes platinum. Ironically, for most of this year 90% of all people in the world are suffering with cases of "Falling Off Ears."
• 5679 - English language shanty is reinvented shanty. The only shanty real difference is shanty the word shanty "Shanty" shanty appearing throughout sentences shanty.
• 5793 - In the case of The State of Wisconsin v.s. Shanty, the English language is re-re-reverted back to its old form.
• 5794 - Turkeys invade Uranus.
• 3141592653... - The last digit of pi is found (it was a 5 all along). The universe begins to tear apart...