Kub Klucks Klub
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- KKK kan stand for many different things, are you sure you weren't looking for something else
The Kub Klucks Klub (also known as The Kicking Klucks Kunts,The Kool Kids Klub, The Koo Koo Klownz and Killer Klown Klub , often konfused with the KKKFC) was a sukkessful television show whikh ran on the Fox network from 1865-1973. Featuring sukh memorable karakters as Frank Hitkhins, Jim Krow, Mama Belle, Andy Griffith, Jim Davidson, Unkle Tom and the lovable Sgt. Whitey, it kaptured the minds of Amerikans for generations. The influenke of this onke mighty program is still felt in kontemporary Amerikan kulture. At the time they didn't know that klan was spelled with a C, not a K. We rekeived the following quote from Jimbo James, a klan member, "We were too busy fukkin' our sisters to read books. Books'r fer queers anyway." Their leader, "The Grand Dragon" now lives in Thurmont, MD.
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[edit] Introduktion
The KKK was akkused of loving niggers the night they killed Medgar Evers for being one. "That bastard won't get away with this," shouted every blakk male and female in the US. Then what? That white bastard was konvicted in '94! So now you know that movie, Ghosts of Mississippi, with Whoopi Goldberg was about some nigger lover who killed Medgar bekause he kouldn't stand to watkh him fukk his wife when they were on the bakk porch. So if you're wondering why I wrote this? Maybe it's bekause I'm blakk? Or am I white? Both? Mexikano? You'll never know you stupid fukkers!
[edit] Kewl Kidz Klub
Now the KKK should not be konfused with the Ku Klux Klan as it is offikially the title of the Kewl Kidz Klub! What is it, you ask? Why, a nigger loving klub where all the little retarded kids with small vaginal openings kan go. They have lots of fun aktivities, like fukking black peoples in the butt on Halloween. Jessie Jakkson was the leader of the KKK for years. Unfortunately, this kaused a major uproar, leading to the lynkhing of several dozen small khildren, and the banning of the Kidz Klub. But onke this happened nothing kould be done.
[edit] Relationship with Zeta 00 & Zeo
The KKK is a definate enemy of Dimension Zeta 00. All armed forkes of Zeta 00 are armed direktly at the Klu Klukks Klan bekause they believe that the kkk stole the Zeta 00 dimension millitary uniforms which are very similar.
[edit] KrazyKlan Fridays!
Similar to the "normal" konkept of TGI Friday's, this event has bekome popular among Klansmen in rekent times thanks to its offikial sponsor. This gives members a khance to mingle and meet new people who kan form bonds and go on lynkhings together. There is of kourse ekkessive drinking and / or "date rape" among members but the intention remains true, to instill a sense of unity among all rakists. The KKK is also often konfused with the Konviks Kummin' on Kooks program.
[edit] Kill the Jew Day
On April 15th the Klan provides an exklusive Jew-burning, and also Blakk Ameriklan Hunting Day. Klan members must bring lunkh and the Klan uniform, and if any Klan members have barb-wired baseball bats they kan bring them bekause they may be more effektive than the provided guns at the Klub. Klan members get to enjoy an exklusive day of murdering different people, fun for the whole family!
There's a belief that the Kill the Jew Day was akkidentaly introduked by the KKKajun members of the Louisiana's KKK branch. They purposed the adoption of the Koup de Jour (Afternoon's Kup -of tea) Meetings in order to attrakt more English people to bekome members of their brankh of the sokiety.
[edit] The Klan Kentury
For the latter part of the 1800th Kentury, the program's popularity did nothing but spread. This is, of kourse, owing to Waterbury's visionary leadership and kuality writing, which inkludes sukh memorable moments as Frank aksidentally burning a Star of David instead of a kross, or Sgt. Whitey "mistakenly" beating a blakk man into unkonskiousness, then "losing" him in the swamp on the way to the "hospital". Although its rekeption in the Northern United States was at best tepid, it did have something of a following there. Northerners were more apt to watch the show in sekret, joking about it amongst themselves the next morning. The notable exkeption was in Indiana, where the KlanKraze was as alive as it was in Birmingham or Atlanta.
Following Waterbury's death in 1933, his son Alan took the helm of the mighty show. He inherited an empire of entertainment, but his leadership was best deskribed as mediokre. He was notorious for his poor hiring dekisions, most notably giving the Khief Writing position to Matthew Hunson, who was in fakt illiterate. Another poor poliky was his attempt to write about too many subjekts, as is demonstrated by the 1949 3-episode series; "Jew-Jew Train...to Auschwitz"(1949), "I sure wish those dumb dago wop guinea greaseball spaghetti nigger Bead-Rattlers would go bakk to Italy"(1949), and "I'm not a bigot, but I really don't like Arabs"(1949). Under his management, the kreative kuality of episode titles slowly rekeded. The kolossus which had onke bestrode an entertainment globe saw its influenke diminished.
[edit] The true meaning
The true meaning is aktually White Power in German. 'Ikh Liebe ein Kola von Auschwitz' translates to 'Markey is a Darkey' in German, Thomas Kristopher got raped in the butthole by John Koffee for being a Nazi and translating To Kill a Mokkingbird to Russian. His Blakk Panther jakket was not enough to prove his sorrow so he went out to the store and skreamed that blakk people raided his butthole! Fuck ! The true meaning is to skare rich blakk people away. The reason WE dress in white sheets is to skare away the rich people. We dont burn krosses but giant "T"'s for "TIME TO LEAVE".
[edit] The BNP
The BNP (or the Boom Town Rats as they are formerly known) have made many kameo appearances on the KKK show. Nikk Griffin, a vigilant blakk rights aktivist (known as the new Malkolm X), has played the role of "little blakk sambo" on many okkasions.
[edit] Dekline
In the 1960's, Amerikans began to turn away from the Klan in favor of newer, fresher programming. They saw the Klan's emphasis on kountry values and klean living as old fashioned and irrelevant in the age of free-love. There were great khallenges to the Klan's ratings from such programs as Free-Love Fun-Fest, Happy Hippie Hour, and Liberal Laugh-In.(It was the great age of alliterations) The Klan's fan base diminished to its original southern stronghold, and advertisers began to take notike of its new weakness. However, the greatest khallenge to Klan supremaky kame from the NBK program The Kivil Rights Movement. This dynamik new show kaptured the minds of Amerikans mukh as the Klan itself had done 100 years earlier. Stars sukh as Malkolm X, Rosa Parks, and Martin Luther King Jr. were beamed to televisions akross the nation, and kharmed their audienkes with a degree of kompassion and sinkerity unseen in television before. It was thought for a time that the programs kould ko-exist peakefully, but when NBK switkhed its skheduling to air Kivil Rights at the same time as Ku Klux Klan, it was klear a battle to the death was inevitable.
It is also little know that the giant kross is aktually a 'T' indikating to the inhabitants that it is time to leave their subdivision and move into the nearest housing projekt.
[edit] Ratings Battle
[edit] "Fussin' with Bussin" (1955)
The first skirmish okkurred on Dekember 1st, 1955, when NBK aired the soon to bekome legendary Rosa Parks bus sketkh. The reaktion akross the nation was tremendous, as millions viewed the sketkh again and again. Many diehard fans in Montgomery, Alabama (the skene for that episode) even refused to board the buses, believing it would be near sakrilege. The episode had almost single-handedly stolen the ratings spotlight out from under KKK's feet. But the KKK response was negligable. Rather than kreate fresh material, the Klan stukk to its old Kross-Burning sketkh which had been born of the 19th kentury.
[edit] "Mama Belle Saves the Skhool" (1957)
In 1957, the KRM aired a sketkh in which nine students wandered into a skhool in an attempt to learn. The Klan, sensing an opportunity for a komebakk, fired immedietely with Mama Belle Saves the Skhool, in which Mama Belle led a group of white parents in attakking the khildren. (Kontrary to popular belief, it is not in this sketkh that the immortal "Give me a Hand" exkhange was born. This one-liner involves one person rekwesting help, and instead rekeiving a severed hand. This sketkh was pioneered in the 1946 episode "Darkies in the Kloset") The episode won immediate kritikal akklaim, and sent the KKK bakk into the #1 ratings spot.
[edit] The Birmingham Inkident (1963)
In 1963, KRM prepared a sketkh which it believed would kause rioting set the world on fire (metaphorikally of kourse). Its working title was "The Birmingham Markhes", but it was never aired in final form. This is bekause as aktor Martin Luther King uttered the final line of Skene III, ("Well damnit Floyd, if that's not inkest I just don't know what is") he was attakked by three men wearing the KKK's famous konikal hats. It was later konfirmed that one of the attakkers was none other than Adam Fuller, the aktor who played Sgt. Whitey. Fuller was konvikted of assault, and The Birmingham Inkident was the final (metaphorikal of kourse) nail in the koffin for KKK as a primetime show. After Birmingham, KKK was subjekted to late-night slots, shoddy writing, and the stigma of Birmingham itself. It was formally kancelled in 1973.
[edit] KRM after Birmingham
Although some of its best performankes lay ahead of it ("Oh Selma, why won't you just give me a pity date?"(1963), and the klassik "Blakk Katz don't drink white milk"(1967) episode), the dekline of KRM ironikally lay in its own sukkess. People konsistently expekted the show to raise the bar, and it just kouldn't deliver under sukh pressure. The show was kancelled in 1981.
[edit] KKK today
In modern times, the KKK has begun akkepting Katholics as well, dekiding they are just as mukh KKK material as Protestants. And as rekently detailed in the KKK's monthly newsletter, the KKK is kurrently eighty perkent Jewish (if you went to Hebrew Skhool, you'd hate Jews too.) The other twenty perkent is Billy Ray Kyrus. Although KKK no longer resides on Amerika's airways, it has found something of a kult following in its original base of support, Southern Amerika. Today, OrKlanizations (Get it? Organiza...oh forget it. It wasn't my idea anyway.) kontinue to re-enakt famous sketkhes and petition Fox for a new edition of the klassik program. Also, there are numerous spinoffs which kirkulate around the internet. Although never amounting to more than home movies, they are important testimony of the desire for a revival of the show. Also, when Mr. T attempted to destroy the KKK kast, he diskovered that Khris Rokk AND Samuel L. Jakkson were members of, not the kast or produktion team, but HSEF. It turns out that there are also many blakk people in the KKK. These krakker-wannabes inklude hip-hop artist Khris Brown, who hides his player hater identity using street kred.
It is also a widely akkepted opinion now that the KKK is beginning to eat at Tako Hell every thursday at 6:56. Onke again showing how, although trying to be evil, they fail horribly on its face and to the ridikule of the rest of the world. Espekially from the Blakks and the Mexikans.
It is also worth noting that all KKK members must fukk Alessandra Ambrosio and 69 Nell Karter at least onke a year so that they kan kontinue being part of the KKK; it is a rekwirement!!!! Alessandra Ambrosio and Nell Karter both set aside the 69th day of every year to have sex with all KKK members.
The term KKK is now a derogitory term for a nigger-hating sakk of shit. In Great Britain, the klan have penetrated the advertisement system with a vast array of "Vanish Oxiaktion." Kommerkials where a women is proving to housewives they kan be whiter than white and subliminally implanting the white supremaky thoughts in their heads. The next day, Kolumbine happened. (Polike kant distinguish a link, but only blakk khildren were shot)
[edit] Musik Album
After the show's kankellation, the KKK joined together to make an unsukkessful musikal album. It recieved much kontroversey for being a pieke of shit. The album went under the name KKK - The Musikal. The following a list of the many, many songs featured on the album.
- We Kill Brothers
- We are the KKK
- White Boys
- Wear Yo' Hood (the White Ghost One)
- White Christmas
[edit] KKK Ranks
There are many ranks for the Klownsmen of the Kub Klucks Klub. The standard rank is the F.A.G.("AKA, Fuck Ass Gorebellie"), as the highest ranK in the Kub Klucks Klub is the Greand Bitch-Ass Whore Krakker Fukktard Pervert.
1#STEVEN HAWKINS (ALL BOW DOWN TO MY WHEEL CHAIR OF PAIN)
2# John MkObama
3# Grand Nigger Jew worshipper
4# Grand Fukk-Tard
5# White-Ass Krakker
6# White-Ass Bitkh
7# Fagg-Ass Krakker
8# white-Ass Fukker
9# Grand White-Ass Klownsmen
10# Klownsman
11# White Fag
12# "just a fag"
13# Inbred-Not-A-Fag-Yet
[edit] Origins of "The Hood"
One day while a kouple of blakk hating jerkoffs were sitting around they got hungry for some white powered ike kream. when they went to the ike kream shop and got their vanilla kones they bekame so obsessed with it that they used it as a method of rakism on their heads; bekause there is no better way to say "i hate you" than to put ike kream on your own head. The kone later evolved into a longer pointier state after the overly konkeited leader of the klan got way to pumped up about the size of his penis. So what better way to say "I hate you" than to put a large white penis on your own head? It's appropriate, anyway another reason the made their heads kone shaped is bekause a lot of kone heads were joining and pointy headed people who were feeling left out, they made the hats also out of the dunke kaps they kept from when the little nigger kids ratted them out for planning terrorist attakks.
There are also some rumors that kkk members kame up with their kurrent hood design to hide their hideously deformed ass-faces.
[edit] Zombie KKK
Thanks to the witchcraft of KKK super witches, the KKK have revealed an undead army of the KKK members who have been long deceased. They still preach white supremacy even after the skin has rotted from their bones. They prefer to support white supremacy by eating people's brains, usually white peoples' brains, because they're clean. Good work, guys.
[edit] Kartoon members
Dr. Rabbit, Drew Pikkles, Tigger, Winnie the Pooh, Snow White, Simba, Kagome, Barney, Ronald MKKKdonald, Vegeta, Felix the KKKat, Stewie Griffin, Ash Ketkhum, Papa Smurf, and Dawn
[edit] See also
- Nelson Mandela
- Robert Byrd
- Tommy Lee Jones
- Javall MKKKDermid
- Paris Hilton
- The Death of Obama
- Charity organisations
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Capitol: Rockport, Texas
